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Contents
1. Cover
2. Half Title
3. Title Page
4. Copyright Page
5. Table of Contents
6. Preface
7. Acknowledgments
8. About the author
9. CHAPTER 1 What is computation?
1. Inside a computer
2. Machine language
3. Everything is bits
4. The universal machine
5. 1.5 SUMMARY
6. 1.6 FURTHER DISCOVERY
1. Finite precision
2. Division
3. Order of operations
4. Complex numbers
3. 2.3 WHAT’S IN A NAME?
4. 2.4 USING FUNCTIONS
1. Built-in functions
2. Strings
3. Modules
1. Finite precision
2. Negative integers
3. Designing an adder
4. Implementing an adder
6. 2.6 SUMMARY
7. 2.7 FURTHER DISCOVERY
11. CHAPTER 3 Visualizing abstraction
1. Function parameters
2. Let’s plant a garden
1. Program structure
2. Documentation
3. Descriptive names and magic numbers
1. Local namespaces
2. The global namespace
7. 3.7 SUMMARY
8. 3.8 FURTHER DISCOVERY
12. CHAPTER 4 Growth and decay
1. Difference equations
2. Radiocarbon dating
3. Tradeoffs between accuracy and time
4. Propagation of errors
5. Simulating an epidemic
6. 4.6 SUMMING UP
7. 4.7 FURTHER DISCOVERY
8. 4.8 PROJECTS
1. Implementation
2. Testing randomness
1. A genomics primer
2. Basic DNA analysis
3. Transforming sequences
4. Comparing sequences
5. Reading sequence files
8. 6.8 SUMMARY
9. 6.9 FURTHER DISCOVERY
10. 6.10 PROJECTS
3. *7.3 TESTING
1. Unit testing
2. Regression testing
3. Designing unit tests
4. Testing floating point values
4. 7.4 SUMMARY
5. 7.5 FURTHER DISCOVERY
16. CHAPTER 8 Data analysis
1. Tallying values
2. Dictionaries
1. A first algorithm
2. A more elegant algorithm
3. A more efficient algorithm
1. Defining similarity
2. A k-means clustering example
3. Implementing k-means clustering
4. Locating bicycle safety programs
8. 8.8 SUMMARY
9. 8.9 FURTHER DISCOVERY
10. 8.10 PROJECTS
1. Creating a grid
2. Initial configurations
3. Surveying the neighborhood
4. Performing one pass
5. Updating the grid
1. Colors
2. Image filters
3. Transforming images
4. 9.4 SUMMARY
5. 9.5 FURTHER DISCOVERY
6. 9.6 PROJECTS
1. Project 9.1 Modeling segregation
2. Project 9.2 Modeling ferromagnetism
3. Project 9.3 Growing dendrites
18. CHAPTER 10 Self-similarity and recursion
1. 10.1 FRACTALS
1. A fractal tree
2. A fractal snowflake
1. Formal grammars
2. Implementing L-systems
7. 10.7 SUMMARY
8. 10.8 FURTHER DISCOVERY
9. 10.9 PROJECTS
1. Hard problems
6. 11.6 SUMMARY
7. 11.7 FURTHER DISCOVERY
8. 11.8 PROJECTS
1. Making friends
1. Clustering coefficients
2. Scale-free networks
1. Implementing a class
2. Documenting a class
1. String representations
2. Arithmetic
3. Comparison
4. Indexing
3. 13.3 MODULES
1. Namespaces, redux
4. 13.4 A FLOCKING SIMULATION
1. Hash tables
2. Implementing a hash table
3. Implementing indexing
4. ADTs vs. data structures
7. 13.7 SUMMARY
8. 13.8 FURTHER DISCOVERY
9. 13.9 PROJECTS
24. Bibliography
25. Index
Landmarks
1. Cover
2. Table of Contents
1. i
2. ii
3. iii
4. iv
5. v
6. vi
7. vii
8. viii
9. ix
10. x
11. xi
12. xii
13. xiii
14. xiv
15. xv
16. xvi
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20. xx
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Discovering Diverse Content Through
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the rat dropped it. The’ was also a hole in the boot where his bullet
had gone, but this didn’t prove anything. Still, Tank stuck to his
story, so we had to apologize for accusin’ him of lettin’ his good eye
sleep while he kept watch with his free one.
We stuffed burlap into the hole about the ridgepole, an’ that
night bein’ Christmas eve, we all gathered in and held festivities. We
danced an’ told tales an’ sang until a late hour. None of us were
instrument musicians; but we clapped our hands an’ patted with our
feet, an’ Kit took turns dancin’ with us, till it was most like a regular
party. Mexican Slim bet that he could do a Spanish dance as long as
Horace could sing different verses of his song; but we suppressed it
at the ninety-first verse. Tank wanted to let him finish, in the hope it
might kill the trade-rat; but we couldn’t stand any more, ourselves.
Then the Friar taught us a song called, “We three Kings of Orient
are”; an’ we disbursed for the night. It was a gorgeous night, an’ me
an’ the Friar took a little walk under the stars. One of ’em rested just
above the glisteny peak up back o’ the rim, an’ he sang soft an’ low,
the “Star of beauty, star of night” part o’ this song. He allus lifted me
off the earth when he sang this way. Then he sez to me: “After all,
Happy, life pays big dividends, if we just live it hard enough”; an’ he
gave a little sigh an’ went in to tend to Badger-face.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE—THE TRADE-RAT’S
CHRISTMAS-GIFT
Trade-rats haven’t as much idee of real music as coyotes have.
Ninety-one verses of that infernal cow-song, sung in Horace’s nose-
tenor, was enough to drive bed-bugs out of a lumber-camp; but that
night the trade-rat worked harder than ever. We had hid our stuff an’
fastened it down, an’ used every sort of legitimate means to
circumvent the cuss; but he beat us to it every time, an’ switched
our stuff around scandalous.
“Merry Christmas!” yelled Spider Kelley, holdin’ up a rusty sardine
can.
The trade-rat had remembered us all in some the same way, but
we recalled what day it was an’ took it in good part; until, all of a
sudden, ol’ Tank gave a whoop, an’ held up a brown buck-skin bag.
We crowded around an’ wanted him to open it up an’ see what was
inside; but he said it most probably belonged to Olaf or Kit or the
Friar; so we toted it into the cabin an’ asked the one who could
identify it to step out an’ claim his diamonds.
Then we had a surprise—not one o’ the bunch could identify the
bag! We stood around an’ looked at the bag for as much as five
minutes, tryin’ to figure out how the deuce even a trade-rat could
spring stuff on us none of us had ever seen before.
“This is a real trade, sure enough,” sez Horace.
“I tell ya what this is,” sez I. “This is a Christmas-gift for the Friar.
Go on an’ open it, Friar.”
The’ was some soft, Injun-tanned fawn-skin inside, wrappin’ up a
couple o’ papers, an’ two photographs, and an old faded letter. “I
don’t think we have the right to look at these,” sez the Friar.
“How’ll we ever find out who they belong to, then?” asked
Horace. “Look at the letter anyway.”
It was in a blank envelope, an’ it began, “My dear son,” and
ended, “Your lovin’ mother.” The letter was just the same as all
mothers write to their sons, I reckon: full of heartache, an’
tenderness, an’ good advice, an’ scoldin’; but nothin’ to identify
nobody by; so we said ’at the Friar should read the papers. One of
’em was an honorable discharge from the army; but all the names
an’ dates an’ localities had been crossed out. It was what they call
an “Excellent” discharge, which is the best they give, an’ you could
tell by the thumb print ’at this part had been read the most by
whoever had treasured it.
The other paper was simply a clippin’ from a newspaper. It was a
column of items tellin’ about Dovey wishin’ to see Tan Shoes at the
same place next Sunday, an’ such things. The Friar said ’at this was
the personal column, an’ he sure labeled it; ’cause if a feller chose to
guess any, some o’ those items was personal enough to make a bar-
tender blush; but they didn’t convey any news to us as to where the
trade-rat had procured the buck-skin bag.
The photographs were wrapped in tissue paper an’ then tied
together with pink string, face to each. The Friar balked a little at
openin’ ’em up; but we deviled him into it. The first he opened was a
cheap, faded little one of an old lady. She had a sad, patient face,
an’ white hair. Horace was standin’ on a chair, lookin’ over the Friar’s
shoulder, an’ he piped out that the photograph had been took in
New York, an’ asked if we knew any one who lived there, which
most of us did; but not the subject of the photograph.
Then the Friar opened the other one. He took one look at it, an’
then his face turned gray. “This one was took in Rome,” sez Horace.
“Does any one here have a list o’ friends livin’ in Rome, Italy?”
He hadn’t looked at the face on the photograph, nor at the Friar’s
face; but when we didn’t answer, he looked up, saw that we had
sobered in sympathy with the Friar, an’ then he looked at the face on
the photograph an’ got down off the chair. The face was of a
beautiful lady in a low-necked, short-sleeved dress. Not as low nor
as short as some dresses I’ve seen in pictures, but still a purty
generous outlook.
The Friar’s hands shook some; but he gradually got a grip on
himself, an’ purty soon, he sez in a steady voice: “This is a picture of
Signorina Morrissena. Does any one here know of her?”
Well, of course none of us had ever heard of her; so the Friar
wrapped up the package again an’ put it back into the buck-skin
bag. We had expected to have some high jinks that day, an’ Kit had
baked a lot o’ vinegar pies for dinner, we had plenty o’ fresh deer-
meat, an’ we had agreed to let the Friar hold a regular preachin’
first; but when we saw how the picture had shook him up we drifted
back to our own shack an’ sat talkin’ about where the deuce that
blame trade-rat could possibly have got a holt o’ the buck-skin bag. I
was purty sure that it was a picture o’ the Friar’s girl, the extra
trimmin’s on the name not bein’ much in the way of a disguise, an’
as soon as I got a chance to see Horace I questioned him, an’ he
said it was the girl, all right; but that she had developed a lot.
The Friar had taken a hoss an’ gone up into the mountains, an’
had left word that he didn’t want any dinner. We were as full o’
sympathy with him as we could stand, but not in the mood to
sidestep such a meal as Kit had framed up; so we ate till after three
in the afternoon. We didn’t want to do anything to fret him a speck;
so we hardly knew what to do. Generally it tickled him to have us
ask him to preach to us; but we couldn’t tell how he’d feel about it
now, and we were still discussin’ it about the fire when the Friar
came back.
He looked mighty weary, an’ we knew he had been drivin’ himself
purty hard, although it wasn’t just tiredness which showed in his
face. Still, the’ was a sort of peace there, too; so after he’d warmed
himself a while, ol’ Tank asked him if he wouldn’t like to preach to us
a bit.
The Friar once said that back East some folks used good
manners as clothin’ for their souls, but that out our way good-
heartedness was the clothin’, an’ good manners nothin’ more than a
silver band around the hat. “And some o’ the bands are mighty
narrow, Friar,” I added to draw him out. “Yes,” sez he, “but the hats
are mighty broad.”
You just couldn’t floor the Friar in a case like this. He knew ’at
the politeness an’ the good-heartedness in Tank’s request was
divided off about the same as the band an’ the hat; and that all we
wanted was to ease off the Friar’s mind an’ let him feel contented;
so he heaved a sigh and shook his head at Tank.
When a blacksmith goes out into company, folks don’t pester him
with questions as to why tempered steel wasn’t stored up in handy
caves, instead of havin’ nothin’ but rough ore hid away in the cellar
of a mountain; and a carpenter is not held responsible because a
sharp saw cuts better ’n a dull one; but it seems about next to
impossible for a human bein’ to pass up a parson without insultin’
him a little about the ways o’ Providence, and askin’ him a lot o’
questions which would moult feathers out o’ the ruggedest angel in
the bunch.
We could all see ’at the Friar had been havin’ a rough day of it;
so Tank began by askin’ him questions simply to toll him away from
himself; but soon he was shootin’ questions into the Friar as rough
shod as though they was both strangers to each other.
“You say it was sheep-herders what saw the angels that night the
Lord was born,” sez Tank. “How come the’ wasn’t any cow-punchers
saw ’em?” Tank had about the deep-rootedest prejudice again’
sheep-herders I ever saw.
“The’ wasn’t any cow-punchers in that land,” sez the Friar. “It
was a hilly land an’—”
“Well I’d like to know,” broke in ol’ Tank, “why the Lord picked
out such a place as that, when he had the whole world to choose
from.”
O’ course the Friar tried his best to smooth this out; but by the
time he was through, Tank had got tangled up with another
perdicament. “Then, there was ol’ Faro’s dream,” he said, “the one
about the seven lean cows eatin’ the seven fat ones. I’ve punched
cows all my life, and I saw ’em so thin once, when the snow got
crusted an’ the chinook got switched off for a month, that the spikes
on their backbones punched holes through their hides; but they’d as
soon thought o’ flyin’ up an’ grazin’ on clouds, as to turn in an’ eat
one another.”
By the time the Friar had got through explainin’ the difference
between dreams and written history, Tank was ready with another
query. “I heard tell once ’at the Bible sez, ‘If thy eye offends thee,
pluck it out.’ Does the Bible say this?”
“Well, it does,” admitted the Friar; “but you see—”
“Well, my free eye offends me,” broke in Tank. “It never did
offend me until Spike Groogan tried to pluck it out, and it don’t
offend me now as much as it does other folks. Still, I got to own up
’at the blame thing does offend me whenever I meet up with
strangers, ’cause it allus runs wilder in front of a stranger ’n at airy
other time. Now, what I want to know is, why an’ when an’ how
must I pluck out that eye—specially, when it sez in another place
that if a man’s eye is single his whole body is full o’ light. My eye is
single enough to suit any one. Fact is, it’s so blame single that some
folks call it singular; but the’ ain’t no more light in my body ’n there
is in airy other man’s.”
You couldn’t work off any spiritual interpretation stuff on Tank.
He thought an allegory was the varmint which lives in the Florida
swamps. Well, as far as that goes, I did, too, until the Friar pointed
out that it was merely a falsehood used to explain the truth; but
Tank, he didn’t join in with any new-fangled notions, an’ a feller had
to talk to him as straight out as though talkin’ to a hoss. The’ was
lots of times I didn’t envy the Friar his job.
But after he had satisfied Tank that it wasn’t required of him to
discard either of his lamps, especially the free one, he drifted off into
tellin’ us how he had spent the day—and then I envied him a little,
for he certainly did have the gift o’ wranglin’ words.
He told about havin’ rode up the mountain as far as he could go,
and then climbin’ as far as he could on foot. He showed how hard it
was to tell either a man or a mountain by the lines in their faces,
and he went on with this till he made a mountain almost human.
Then he switched around and showed how much a mountain was
like life, ambition bein’ like pickin’ out the mountain, the easy little
foothills bein’ the start, the summit allus hid while a feller was
climbin’, and each little plateau urgin’ him to give up there and rest.
He compared life and a mountain, until it seemed that all a feller
needed for a full edication, was just to have a mountain handy. Then
he wound up by sayin’ that he hadn’t been able to reach the peak.
He had sat in a sheltered nook for a time, gazin’ up at the face of a
cliff with an overhangin’ bank o’ snow on top, the wind swirlin’
masses o’ snow down about him, and everything tryin’ to point out
that he had been a failure, and might as well give up in disgust. He
stopped here, and we were all silent, for, as was usual with him, he
had led us along to where we could see life through his eyes for a
space.
“After a time,” sez the Friar as soon as he saw we were in the
right mood, “I caught my breath again and followed the narrow
ledge I was on around to where I could see the highest peak stand
out clear and solitary; and from my side of it, it wasn’t possible for
any man to reach it. There was no wind here, the air was as sweet
and pure as at the dawn o’ creation, and everywhere I looked I met
glory heaped on glory. A gray cloud rested again’ the far side o’ the
peak, and back o’ this was the sun. Ah, there was a silver and a
golden linin’ both to this cloud; and all of a sudden I was comforted.
“I had done all I could do, and this was my highest peak.
Whatever was the highest peak for others, this was the highest peak
for me; and there was no more bitterness or envy or doubt or fear in
my heart. I stood for a long time lookin’ up at the gray cloud with its
dazzling edges, and some very beautiful lines crept into my memory
—‘The paths which are trod, by only the evenin’ and mornin’, and
the feet of the angels of God.’”
The Friar had let himself out a little at the end, and his eyes were
shinin’ when he finished. “I guess I have given you a sermon, after
all, boys,” he said, “and I hope you can use it to as good advantage
as I did when it came to me up on the mountain. We all have
thoughts we can’t put into words, and so I’ve failed to give you all
’at was given me; but it’s some comfort to know that, be they big or
be they little, we don’t have to climb any mountains but our own,
and whether we reach the top or whether we come to a blind wall
first, the main thing is to climb with all our might and with a certain
faith that those who have earned rest shall find it, after the sun has
set.”
This was one of the days when the magic of the Friar’s voice did
strange things to a feller’s insides. We knew ’at he was talkin’ in
parables, an’ talkin’ mostly to himself; but each one of us knew our
own little mountains, an’ it was darn comfortin’ to understand that
the Friar could have as tough a time on his as we had on ours.
We all sat silent, each feller thinkin’ over his own problems; and
after a time, the Friar sang the one beginnin’, “O little town of
Bethlehem!” It was dark by this time, but the firelight fell on his
face, an’ made it so soft-like an’ tender that ol’ Tank Williams sniffled
audible once, an’ when the song was finished he piled a lot more
wood on the fire, an’ pertended ’at he was catchin’ cold. When Kit
called us in to supper, we all sat still for a full minute, before we
could get back to our appetites again.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX—A CONTESTED LIFE-TITLE
The bullet which had gone through Badger-face hadn’t touched a
single bone. It had gone through his left lung purty high up, but
somethin’ like the pneumonie set in, an’ he was a sorry lookin’ sight
when the fever started to die out after havin’ hung on for two
weeks. He had been drinkin’ consid’able beforehand, which made it
bad for him, an’ the Friar said it was all a question of reserve. If
Badger-face had enough of his constitution left to tide him over, he
stood a good chance; but otherwise it was his turn.
He didn’t have much blood left in him at the end of two weeks on
air and water, and he didn’t have enough fat to pillow his bones on.
We all thought ’at he ought to have something in the way o’ feed;
but the Friar wouldn’t stand for one single thing except water. He
said ’at food had killed a heap more wounded men ’n bullets ever
had; so we let him engineer it through in his own way.
When the fever started to leave, he got so weak ’at Horace
thought he was goin’ to flicker out, an’ he felt purty bad about it. He
didn’t regret havin’ done it, an’ said he would do just the same if he
had it to do over; but it calls up some mighty serious thoughts when
a fellow reflects that he is the one who has pushed another off into
the dark. On the night when it seemed certain that Badger-face
would lose his grip, we all went into his room an’ sat around waitin’
for the end, to sort o’ cheer him up a little. Life itself is a strange
enough adventure, but death has it beat a mile.
Along about nine o’clock, Badger said in a low, trembly voice:
“What’d you fellers do to me, if I got well?”
He didn’t even open his eyes; so we didn’t pay any heed to him.
When he first got out of his head, he had rambled consid’able. Part
o’ the time he seemed to be excusin’ himself for what he had done,
an’ part o’ the time he seemed to be gloatin’ over his devilment; but
the’ wasn’t any thread to his discourse so we didn’t set much store
by it. After waitin’ a few minutes, he quavered out his question
again, an’ the Friar told him not to worry about anything, but just to
set his mind on gettin’ well.
Badger shook his head feebly from side to side an’ mumbled,
“That don’t go, that don’t go with me.” He paused here for a rest,
an’ then went on. “I’ve been in my right mind all day, an’ I’ve been
thinkin’ a lot, an’ tryin’ some experiments. I can breathe in a certain
way which makes me easier an’ stronger, an’ I can breathe in
another way which shuts off my heart. I don’t intend to get well
merely for the pleasure o’ gettin’ lynched; so if that’s your game, I
intend to shut off my heart an’ quit before I get back the flavor o’
life. It don’t make two-bits difference with me either way. What d’ ya
intend to do?”
He had been a long time sayin’ this, an’ we had exchanged
glances purty promiscuous. We hadn’t give a thought as to what we
would do with him, providin’ he responded to our efforts to save his
life; but it was purty generally understood that Badger had fitted
himself to be strung up, just the same as if he hadn’t been shot at
all. Now, though, when we came to consider it, this hardly seemed a
square deal. There wasn’t much common sense in chokin’ a man’s
life down his throat for two weeks, only to jerk it out again at the
end of a rope, an’ we found ourselves in somethin’ of a complication.
“What do ya think we ort to do to ya?” asked Tank.
“Lynch me,” sez Badger, without openin’ his eyes; “but I don’t
intend to wait for it. I don’t blame ya none, fellers. I did ya all the
dirt I could; but I don’t intend to furnish ya with no circus
performance—I’m goin’ on.”
He began to breathe different, an’ his face began to get purplish
an’ ghastly. “Can he kill himself that way?” I asked the Friar.
“I don’t know,” sez the Friar. “I think ’at when he loses
consciousness, nature’ll take holt, an’ make him breathe the most
comfortable way—but I don’t know.”
“Let Olaf take a look at his flame,” sez Horace; so Olaf looked at
Badger a long time.
Olaf hadn’t wasted much of his time on Badger. He wasn’t long
on forgiveness, Olaf wasn’t; an’ ever since the time ’at Badger had
been so enthusiastic in tryin’ to have him lynched for killin’ Bud
Fisher, Olaf had give it out as his opinion that Badger was doomed
for hell, an’ he wasn’t disposed to take any hand in postponin’ his
departure. Olaf was the matter-o’-factest feller I ever knew. The’
don’t seem to be much harm in most of our cussin’, but when Olaf
indulged in profanity, he was solemn an’ earnest, the same as if he
was sayin’ a prayer backwards.
“It don’t look like Badger’s flame,” sez he after a time. “It’s gettin’
mighty weak an’ blue, an’ the’s a thick spot over his heart which
shows plainer ’n the one over his wound.”
“I move we give him a fresh start,” sez Horace.
“He’d ort to be lynched,” sez Tank. “I don’t see why we can’t try
him out now, an’ if we find him guilty, why he can kill himself if he
wants to, or else get well again an’ we’ll do it for him.”
Neither what Horace said nor what Tank said called out much
response. We knew the’ wasn’t any one could say a good word for
Badger-face an’ so he well deserved his stretchin’; but on the other
hand, there he was turnin’ gray before our eyes, an’ it went again’
our nature to discard him, after havin’ hung on to him for two
weeks. The Friar left the side of the bed an’ retired into a corner,
leavin’ us free to express ourselves.
“I don’t see how we can let him go free,” sez Tank. “He sez
himself ’at he ort to be lynched; an’ when a feller can’t speak a good
word for himself, I don’t see who can.”
“Badger-face,” sez Horace, “you’re the darnedest bother of a man
I ever saw. First you infest us until we have to shoot a hole through
you, an’ then we have to nurse you for two weeks, an’ now you’re
diggin’ your heels into our consciences. I give you my word we won’t
lynch you if you get well. We’ll turn you over to the law.”
Badger’s thin lips fell back over his yellow teeth in the ghastliest
grin a live man ever hung out. “The law,” sez he with bitter sarcasm,
“the law! Have you ever been in a penitentiary?”
“No,” sez Horace, “I have not.”
“Well, I have,” sez Badger. “I was put in for another feller’s deed;
an’ they gave me the solitary, the jacket, the bull-rings, the water-
cure, and if you’ll roll me over after I’m dead, you can still see the
scars of the whip on my back. I’ve tried the law, an’ I’ll see you all
damned before I try it again.”
Badger-face was as game as they generally get. As soon as he
stopped talkin’ he began to breathe against his heart again. Horace
stood lookin’ at him for a full minute, an’ then he lost his temper.
“You’re a coward, that’s what you are!” sez Horace. “I said all
along ’at you were a coward, an’ another feller said so too, an’ now
you’re provin’ it. You can sneak an’ kill cows an’ cut saddles in the
dark, but you haven’t the nerve to face things in the open. Now,
you’re sneakin’ off into the darkness o’ death because you’re afraid
to face the light of life.”
This was handin’ it to him purty undiluted, an’ Badger opened his
eyes an’ looked at Horace. His eyes were heavy an’ dull, but they
didn’t waver any. “Dinky,” sez Badger-face, “the only thing I got
again’ you is your size. I’ve been called a lot o’ different things in my
time; but you’re the first gazabo ’at ever called me a coward—an’
you’re about the only one who has a right to, ’cause you put me out
fair an’ square. I wish you had traveled my path alongside o’ me,
though. You ain’t no milksop, but after you’d been given a few o’ the
deals I’ve had, you’d take to the dark too. You can call me a coward
if you want to, or, after I’m gone, you can think of me as just bein’
dog tired an’ glad o’ the chance to crawl off into the dark to sleep. I
don’t want to be on your conscience; that’s not my game. All I want
is just to get shut o’ the whole blame business.”
He talked broken an’ quavery, an’ it took him a long time to
finish; but when he did quit, he turned on his bad breathin’ again.
Horace had flushed up some when Badger had mentioned milksop;
but when he had finished, Horace took his wasted hand in a hearty
grip, an’ sez: “I take it back, Badger. You ain’t no coward. I only
wanted to taunt you into stickin’ for another round; but I think
mighty well o’ ya. Will you agree to cut loose from the Ty Jones
crowd an’ try to be a man, if we give you your freedom, a new
outfit, and enough money to carry you out of the country?”
It was some time before Badger spoke, an’ then he said: “Nope,
I can’t do it. Ty knows my record, an’ he’s treated me white; but if I
quit him, he’ll get me when I least expect it. Now understand, Dinky,
that I don’t hold a thing again’ you, you’re the squarest feller I’ve
ever met up with; but I’m not comin’ back to life again. From where
I am now, I can see it purty plain, an’ it ain’t worth the trouble.”
“You could write back to Ty that you made your escape from us,”
sez Horace.
“That’s the best idee you’ve put over,” sez Badger, after he’d
thought it out; “but I haven’t enough taste for life to make the
experiment. Don’t fuss about me any more. I don’t suffer a mite. I
feel just like a feller in the Injun country, goin’ to sleep on post after
days in the saddle. He knows it’ll mean death, but he’s too tired out
to care a white bean.”
“Have you ever been in the army?” asked the Friar from his place
in the corner. We all gave a little start at the sound of his voice, for it
came with a snap an’ unexpected.
Badger’s lips dropped back for another hideous grin. “Yes,” he
said, “I’ve been in both the penitentiary and the army—and they’re a
likely pair.”
“Did you have a buck-skin bag?” asked the Friar, comin’ up to the
bed.
Badger-face tried to raise himself on his elbow, but he couldn’t
quite make it. “Yes, I did,” sez he, droppin’ back again. “What
became of it?”
“I am keepin’ it for ya,” sez the Friar. “Do you wish to leave any
word in case you do not recover?”
“No,” sez Badger, “the’ ain’t no one to leave word to. That letter
was from my mother, an’ that was her picture. She’s been dead a
long string o’ years now.”
“There was another picture an’ a newspaper clippin’,” sez the
Friar.
Badger-face didn’t give no heed; an’ after a time the Friar sez:
“What shall I do with them?”
“Throw ’em away,” sez Badger-face. “They don’t concern me
none. I was more took with that woman’s picture ’n airy other I ever
saw. That was all.”
“Where did you get it?” asked the Friar.
“I got it from a young Dutchy,” sez Badger wearily. “He killed a
feller over at Leadville an’ came out here an’ took on with Ty Jones.
He said she was an opery singer, an’ got drugged at a hotel where
he was workin’.”
Badger-face was gettin’ purty weak by now, an’ he stopped with
a sort of sigh. The Friar took holt of his hand. “I am very much
interested in this woman,” he said, lookin’ into Badger’s face as if
tryin’ to give him life enough to go on with. “Can you tell me
anything else about her?”
“Not much,” sez Badger-face. “She was singin’ at what he called
the Winter Garden at Berlin, Germany. Some Austrian nobility got
mashed on her an’ drugged her at the hotel. Dutchy was mashed on
her, too, I reckon. They had advertised for him in a New York paper,
an’ when he got shot, over at Little Monte’s dance hall, he asked me
to write about it. His mother had died leavin’ property, an’ all they
wanted was to round up the heirs. I reckon they were glad enough
to have Dutchy scratched from the list. I don’t know why I did keep
that clippin’.”
“Have you any idee how long ago it was ’at the woman was
drugged?” asked the Friar.
“I haven’t any idee,” sez Badger-face weakly. “Carl was killed four
years ago this Christmas eve; so it had to be before that.”
“Listen to me, Badger-face,” sez the Friar, grippin’ his hand tight.
“I want you to get well. I know that all these men will stand by you
and help you to start a new life.”
“How long is it since I’ve been laid up?” asked Badger.
“Two weeks,” sez the Friar. “This is two days after Christmas.”
“Who tended to me?” asked Badger.
“We all did,” sez the Friar, “and we all stand ready to help you
make a new start.”
“I had a good enough start,” sez Badger; “but I fooled it away,
an’ I’m too old now to make a new one.”
“Is there any word you want sent to your friends at Ty Jones’s?”
asked the Friar.
Once more Badger skinned his face into the grin. “Friends?” sez
he. “When you trap a wolf, does he send any word to his friends? I
haven’t got no friends.”
“Swallow this milk,” sez Horace holdin’ some of it out to him in a
big spoon. Kit had made Olaf start to milkin’ a cow, ’cause she
wanted to use milk in cookin’, and intended to make butter when she
had the cream saved up. Badger put the milk in his mouth, an’ then
spit it out again.
“Don’t you put anything else in my mouth,” he sez. “I told you I
was goin’ to die; an’ by blank, I am goin’ to die.”
“Fellers,” sez Horace, turnin’ to us, “do you think this man is goin’
to die?” We all nodded our heads. “Then, will you give his life to me,
to do with as I will?” asked Horace; and we nodded our heads again.
Horace took off his coat, an’ rolled up his sleeves, an’ then he
came over an’ shook Badger-face by the shoulder. “Listen to me,” he
sez. “I fought ya once before, for your life, and I’m goin’ to fight you
for it now. Do you hear what I say—I’m goin’ to fight you for your
own life. I’m goin’ to make you swallow milk, if I have to tie you an’
pour it in through a funnel. You can’t hold your breath an’ fight, an’
I’m goin’ to fight you.”
Badger-face opened his eyes an’ looked up into Horace’s face. He
looked a long time, an’ the ghost of a smile crept into his face. “Well,
you’re the doggonedest little cuss I ever saw!” he exclaimed. He
waited a long time, an’ then set his teeth. “You beat me once,” he
muttered. “Now, see if you can beat me again.”
It was after midnight; so when Horace dropped the hint that he
wouldn’t need any help except from me an’ the Friar, the rest o’ the
boys dug out for the bunk shack. Then Horace took us over to the
fireplace an’ asked us what was the best thing to do.
“I do believe ’at you have stumbled on the right plan to save
him,” sez the Friar. “He has no fever, the wound is doin’ splendid,
and he has a powerful constitution. The trouble is that he does not
will to live. We must spur on his will, and if we can make him fight
back, this’ll help. Also we must control him as much as possible
through suggestion. Have you any plan o’ your own?”
“No,” sez Horace candidly. Horace didn’t need anything for any
emergency except his own nerve. “I am determined that he must
live, but I have no plan.”
“The first thing is to give him a little warm milk,” sez the Friar.
“All right,” sez Horace. “You tell me what to do—by signs, as
much as possible—but let me give the orders to Badger-face. My size
has made an impression on him, and we can’t afford to lose a single
trick.” The Friar agreed to this an’ we went back to the bunk.
“Badger-face,” sez Horace, “I’d rather give you this milk peaceful;
but I’m goin’ to give it to ya, an’ you can bet what ya like on that.”
Badger opened his eyes again, an’ they were dull an’ glazy. “This
reminds me o’ the water-cure at the pen,” he said, an’ then set his
teeth.
“Hold his hands, Happy,” sez Horace, as full o’ fight as a snow-
plow. “Hold his head, Friar. Now then, swallow or drown.”
It looked purty inhuman, but Badger had to swallow after a bit,
an’ when we had put as much milk into him as we wanted—only a
couple o’ spoonfuls—we let him go, an’ he fell asleep, pantin’ a little.
We woke him up in half an hour, an’ put some more milk into him.
When he slept, his breathin’ was more like natural, an’ the fourth
time, I didn’t have to hold his hands; so I went to sleep myself.
Well, Horace won this fight, too. In about four days, Badger-face
began to have an appetite, an’ then it was all off with him. He
couldn’t have died if we’d left him plumb alone; but he hadn’t give
up yet. The Friar kept him down to a mighty infan-tile diet, sayin’
that a lung shot was a bad one, an’ the pure mountain air was all
that had saved him; but even now fever was likely to come back on
him.
It was close to the tenth o’ January when Horace came in from a
ride one evenin’, an’ went in to see Badger-face, still wearin’ his gun.
Quick as a wink, Badger grabbed the gun; but Horace threw himself
on Badger’s arm, an’ yelled for help. The Friar an’ Olaf rushed in
from the lean-to, an’ corraled the gun in short order.
“You blame little bob-cat, you!” sez Badger. “I didn’t intend to use
the gun on you.”
“I know what you intended to do,” sez Horace; “but you don’t
win this deal as easy as all that.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN—A STRANGE ALLIANCE
After this we tied Badger-face in bed an’ kept watch of him. He kept
on gettin’ stronger all the time, an’ a good percent of his meanness
came back with his strength. Sometimes he’d spend hours tauntin’
Horace an’ the Friar; but they didn’t mind it any more ’n if Badger
had been a caged beast. Then one night he concluded to try cussin’.
He started in to devise somethin’ extra fancy in the way o’ high-
colored profanity; but he hadn’t gone very far on this path, before
Olaf came in as black as a thunder cloud.
“Do you want to be whipped with a whip?” he demanded.
“Naw, I don’t want to be whipped with a whip,” sez Badger-face.
“Then you stop swearin’,” sez Olaf. “We been to enough trouble
about you, and I don’t intend to have my wife listen to any more o’
your swearin’. If you don’t stop it, I whip all your skin off. You say
you want to die—I whip you to death before your very eyes.”
Badger heaved at his ropes a time or two, an’ then he realized
his weakness, sank back on the bed, an’ the tears rolled down his
cheeks. He fair sobbed. “You’re a set o’ cowards,” he yelled, “the
whole pack o’ you! You wouldn’t let me die, and now you threaten to
whip me to death. I dare any one of ya to shoot me—you yellow-
hearted cowards!”
“I care not for what you say I am,” said Olaf. “You know if I am a
coward, and you know if I keep my word. I say to you, slow an’
careful, that if you yell swear words again in my house, I whip your
hide off.”
Well, this had a quietin’ influence on Badger’s conversation; but
he fretted himself a good deal as to what we intended to do with
him. Finally one day when he began to look a little more like a live
man than a skeleton, Horace sez to him: “Badger, you said you
didn’t have any friends, an’ it must be true, ’cause not one of your
own outfit has ever been to see you, not even Ty Jones.”
“Ty Jones don’t stay out here through the winter,” sez Badger-
face. “If he’d been here, he’d have squared things up for this, one
way or another.”
“Where does he go?” asked Horace.
“I don’t know,” sez Badger-face.
Horace asked Olaf about it, and Olaf said ’at Ty Jones allus pulled
out in December, an’ didn’t come back until March.
Then Horace came in and sat by Badger again. “I’ve got a
proposition to make to you,” sez he, “and you think it over before
you answer. I have plenty o’ money; but I’ve wasted most o’ my life,
sittin’ down. If you are sick of livin’ like a wolf, I’ll pay your expenses
and half again as much as Ty Jones is payin’ you, and all you’ll have
to agree to is to go along as a sort of handy-man for me. I think we
can get to be purty good friends, but that can wait. I intend to
ramble around wherever my notions take me. If you’ll give your
word to be as decent as you can, I’ll give my word to stand by you
as far as I’m able. Your life is forfeit to me, an’ if you’ll do your part,
I intend to make the balance of it worth while to ya. Now, don’t
answer me; but think it over an’ ask all the questions you want to.
I’ll answer true what I do answer; but I won’t answer any ’at I don’t
want to.”
If Horace had crept in an’ cut off his two ears, Badger wouldn’t
have been any more surprised. Well, none of us would, as far as that
goes; though why we should let anything ’at Horace chose to do
surprise us by this time is more ’n I know.
He an’ Badger talked it over complete for several days, Horace
agreein’ that he wouldn’t ask Badger to go anywhere the army or
the law was likely to get him an’ not to make him do any stunts ’at
would make him look foolish. He told Horace ’at he had served one
enlistment an’ got a top-notch discharge, an’ had then took on
again; but a drunken officer had him tied on a spare artillery wheel
because Badger had laughed when the officer had fallen off his
horse into a mud puddle. He said they had laid the wheel on the
ground and him across it, the small of his back restin’ on the hub o’
the wheel, an’ his arms an’ legs spread an’ tied to the rim, an’ had
kept him there ten hours. He said that he had deserted the first
chance he got; but he refused to tell what had happened to the
officer afterward.
Finally Badger said he would take up Horace’s proposition; an’
Horace called Olaf in to see if Badger was speakin’ true. This was the
first Badger had ever heard about Olaf’s eyes seein’ soul-flames; but
he said ’at this explained a lot to him he hadn’t understood before.
Olaf looked at him careful; an’ Badger held up his right hand an’ said
that as long as Horace treated him square, he would be square with
Horace, even to the point of givin’ up his life for him.
“He is speakin’ true,” sez Olaf; and from that very minute,
Badger-face became a different man, an’ Horace took off the ropes.
“You do look some like a badger with that bum beard on,” sez
Horace; “but I don’t like this name, and I want you to pick out a new
one. Pick out some Christian name, your own or any other; but now
that you are startin’ on a new life, it will help to have a new name.”
Badger-face studied over this a long time, but he couldn’t root up
any name to suit him so he told Horace to pick out a name, and he’d
agree to wear it.
“Well,” sez Horace, after he’d give it a good thinkin’ over, “I think
I’ll call you Promotheus.”
Badger looked at him purty skeptical. “I don’t intend to take no
Greaser name,” sez he. “Is that Mexican?”
“No,” sez Horace. “That’s Greek; an’ the original Promotheus was
an all around top-notcher. He was a giant, so you couldn’t complain
none on your size; he rebelled again’ the powers, so you couldn’t
call him a dog-robber; but the thing ’at you two are closest together
in, is your infernal stubbornness. They tried to break Promotheus
down by chainin’ him to a rock while the vultures fed on his liver, but
they couldn’t make him give in. ‘Pity the slaves who take the yoke,’
sez he; ‘but don’t pity me who still have my own self-respect.’”
Badger-face was so blame weak that his eyes filled up with tears
at this; an’ the only way he could straighten himself up was to put a
few florid curses on his own thumby left-handedness; but Olaf had
gone after some wood, so it didn’t start anything. “I’ll take that
name,” sez he, “an’ I’ll learn how to spell an’ pronounce it as soon as
I can; but you’ve diluted down my blood so confounded thin with
your doggone, sloppy milk diet that I’m a long way from havin’ that
feller’s grit, right at this minute.”
Horace stood over Badger-face, an’ pointed his finger at him,
fierce. “Listen to me,” sez he. “The next time you heave out an insult
to milksops or milk diets, I’ll sing you my entire song—to the very
last word.”
We set up a howl; but Badger-face didn’t realize all he was up
against when he took on with Horace, so he only smiled in a sickly
way, an’ looked puzzled.
“I’ll tell ya what I’m willin’ to do, Dinky,” said he, as soon as we
stopped our noise; “now that I’ve took a new name, I don’t need to
wear this sort of a beard any more, an’, if ya want me to, I’ll trim it
up the same fool way ’at you wear yours; an’ I’ll wear glasses, too, if
you say the word.”
“We’ll wait first to see how you look in a biled shirt,” sez Horace;
“but in honor of your new name, I’m goin’ to let you have some
deer-meat soup for your dinner, an’ a bone to gnaw on.”
We had a regular feast that day, and called Badger-face
Promotheus every time we could think up an excuse; so as to have
practice on the name. The Friar did his best to take part; but I knew
every line in his face, and it hurt me to see him fightin’ at himself.
After dinner we took a walk together; but we didn’t talk none
until we had climbed the rim, fought the wind for a couple of hours,
an’ started back again. It was his plan to think of some big, common
chunk of life when he was in trouble, so as to take his mind as much
as possible off himself; and he started to talk about Horace an’
Promotheus. He even laughed a little at the combination which
Promotheus Flannigan an’ Horace Walpole Bradford would make
when they settled down on the East again.
“The more I think it over,” said the Friar, “the plainer I can see
that most of our sorrow an’ pain and savageness comes from our
custom of punishin’ the crops instead of the farmers. Look at the
possibilities the’ was in Promotheus when he started out. He has a
strong nature, and in spite of his life, he still has a lot o’ decent
humanity in him. Who can tell what he might have been, if his good
qualities had been cultivated instead o’ smothered?”
“That’s true enough,” sez I; “and look at Horace, too. They
simply let him wither up for forty years, and yet all this time he had
in him full as much devilment as Promotheus himself.”
“Oh, we waste, we waste, we waste!” exclaimed the Friar.
“Instead o’ usin’ the strength and vigor of our manhood in a noble
way, we let some of it rust and decay, and some of it we use for our
own destruction. The outlaw would have been the hero with the
same opportunity, and who can tell what powers lie hidden behind
the mask of idleness!”
“Well, that’s just it,” sez I. “A human bein’ is like a keg o’ black
stuff. For years it may sit around perfectly harmless; and only when
the right spark pops into it can we tell whether it’s black sand or
blastin’ powder. Even Horace, himself, thought he was black sand;
but he turned out to be a mighty high grade o’ powder.”
We walked on a while without talkin’; but the Friar was wrastlin’
with his own thoughts, an’ finally he stopped an’ asked me as
solemn as though I was the boss o’ that whole country: “If you had
started a lot o’ work, and part of it promised to yield a rich harvest
with the right care, and part of it looked as though it might sink back
to worse than it had been in the beginnin’—is there anything in the
world which could make you give it up?”
The Friar knew my life as well as I did; so I didn’t have to do any
pertendin’ with him. “Yes,” I sez, “the right woman would.”
The Friar didn’t do any pertendin’ with me either. He stood,
shakin’ his head slowly from side to side. “I wish I knew, I wish I
knew,” he said.
We walked on again, an’ when we came in sight o’ the cabin, I
sez to him, in order to give him a chance to free his mind if he saw
fit: “Horace told me what he knew about it.”
“Yes, I know,” sez the Friar; “but no one knew very much. She
was a splendid brave girl, Happy. I had known her when she was a
little girl and I a farmer boy. I was much older than she was, but I
was allus interested in her. There wasn’t one thing they could say
against her—and yet they drove her out o’ my life. I thought she
was dead, I heard that she was dead; so I buried her in my heart,
and came out here where life was strong and young, because I
could not work back there. I tried to work in the slums of the cities;
but I could not conquer my own bitterness, with the rich wastin’ and
the poor starvin’ all about me. I have found joy in my life out here;
but she has come to life again with that picture, and once more I am
at war with myself.”
“Well, I’ll bet my eyes, Friar,” sez I, “that you find the right
answer; but I haven’t got nerve enough to advise ya—though I will
say that if it was me, I’d pike out an’ look for the girl.”
“I wish I knew, I wish I knew,” was all the Friar said.
Promotheus didn’t have any set-backs after this. We talked over
whether it would be better to have him go up to Ty’s an’ tell the
boys some big tale about Dinky Bradford, or to just pull out an’ leave
’em guessin’; and we finally came to the conclusion ’at the last
would be the best.
He was still purty weak by the first o’ February; but he was
beginnin’ to fret at bein’ housed up any longer, so we began to get
ready to hit the back-trail. By takin’ wide circles we could get
through all right, at this season; but with Promotheus still purty
wobbly, it wasn’t likely to be a pleasant trip, an’ we didn’t hurry none
with our preparations. Horace insisted on payin’ Olaf two hundred
dollars for his share o’ the bother, an’ I’m purty certain he slipped Kit
another hundred. He wasn’t no wise scrimpy with money.
We started on the tenth of February, Promotheus ridin’ a quiet
old hoss, an’ still lookin’ purty much like a bitter recollection. They
were consid’able surprised when we arrived at the Diamond Dot; but
we only told ’em as much of our huntin’ as we felt was necessary.
Horace intended to start for the East at once; but next day when
he put on his dude clothes again, Promotheus purty nigh bucked on
him. Most of Horace’s raiment was summer stuff, nachely; but he
had a long checked coat ’at he wore with a double ended cap, which
certainly did look comical. He had cut some fat off his middle, an’
had pushed out his chest an’ shoulders consid’able; so that his stuff
wrinkled on him; and it took a full hour to harden Promotheus to the
change.
“Do I have to look like that?” sez he.
“You conceited ape you!” sez Horace. “You couldn’t look like this
if you went to a beauty doctor for the rest o’ time; but as soon as
we get where they sell clothes for humans, I’m goin’ to provide you
with somethin’ in the nature of a disguise.”
Disguise sounded mighty soothin’ to Promotheus, so he gritted
his teeth, an’ said he wouldn’t go back on his word. The fact was,
that it did give ya an awful shock to see Horace as he formerly was.
We had got so used to seein’ him gettin’ about, able an’ free, that it
almost seemed like a funeral to have him drop down to those clothes
again.
The Friar went over to the station with us, and he an’ Horace had
a confidential talk; and then Horace and Promotheus got on the train
and scampered off East.
“I’m goin’ to stick right here, Happy,” sez the Friar. “I have let my
work get way behind, in tendin’ to Promotheus; but from now on I’m
goin’ to tie into it again. I’d like to do something to put the cattle
men and the sheep men on better terms; but this seems like a hard
problem.”
“Yes,” sez I, “that ain’t no job for a preacher, and I’d advise you
to let it alone. The cattle men will put up the same sort of an
argument for their range ’at the Injuns did; but between you and
me, I doubt if they stand much more show in the long run.”
“I can’t see why there isn’t room for both,” sez the Friar. “It
seems to me that the cattle men are too harsh.”
“Nope,” sez I, “there ain’t room for ’em both, an’ the’s somethin’
irritatin’ about sheep that makes ya want to be harsh with all who
have dealin’s with ’em. Hosses can starve out cattle an’ sheep can
starve out hosses; but after a sheep has grazed over a place, nothin’
bigger ’n an ant can find any forage left. Cattle are wild an’
tempestus, an’ they bellow an’ tear around an’ fight, and the men
who tend ’em are a good bit like ’em; while sheep just meekly take
whatever you’ve a mind to give ’em; but they hang on, just the
same, an’ multiply a heap faster ’n cattle do. A sheep man is meek—
like a Jew. If a Jew gets what he wants he’s satisfied, an’ he’s willin’
to pertend ’at he’s had the worst o’ the deal; but a cattle man is
never satisfied unless he has grabbed what he wanted away from
some one else, an’ then shot him up a little for kickin’ about it. It’ll
probably be fifty or a hundred years yet, before the sheep men are
strong enough to worry the cattle men; but they’ll sure do it some
day.” That’s what I told the Friar that time at the station, an’ I
guessed the outcome close enough, though I didn’t make much of a
hit as to the time it was goin’ to take.
Well, the Friar, he rode away east to Laramie, and I went north to
the Diamond Dot, and got things ready for the summer work.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT—THE HEART OF HAPPY
HAWKINS
Late the next summer, I got a fine long letter from Horace—and
blame if he didn’t succeed in surprisin’ me again. He wrote this letter
from Africa, which is about the foreignest parts this world is able to
exhibit, I reckon. He told about the East not findin’ favor with
Promotheus, though he had done all he could for him, startin’ out
with high society and endin’ up by takin’ him down one night to a
sailor’s saloon and lettin’ him mix into a general fight; but that
Promotheus just simply couldn’t stand the tameness, and so they
had gone to Africa to hunt big game, and give the folks out our way
a chance to forget there ever had been such a cuss as Badger-face.
He sent along some photographs, too, and they was as novel as
a blue moon—Horace, Promotheus, and a lot o’ naked niggers totin’
packs on their heads. Horace was the funniest lookin’ mortal a body
ever saw; but Promotheus had him beat a mile. They both wore
bowls on their heads an’ colored glasses; but Promotheus with side-
burns was sure enough to frighten a snake into convulsions! His
gnawin’ teeth stuck out through a self-satisfied grin; and I was willin’
to bet that as soon as the heathen saw him, they’d give up bowin’
down to wood an’ stone.
The next time I saw Friar Tuck, he told me about receivin’ a letter
from Horace who had gone to Berlin on his way to Africa, but hadn’t
been able to learn anything satisfactory. The singer had been the big
card at their concerts, an’ there had been some talk about her gettin’
drugged by an Austrian who belonged to the em-bassy; but she had
disappeared complete, an’ nobody could be found who seemed to
know anything about it. The Friar kept himself goin’ like a steam-
engine these days; but while he became a little more tender if
possible, he lacked something of his old-time spirits. Before this, he
used to come sweepin’ along like a big cool breeze, an’ a feller’s
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