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MAKER
I N N O VAT I O N S
SERIES
micro:bit Projects
with Python
and Single Board
Computers
Building STEAM Projects with
Code Club and Kids’ Maker Groups
—
Martin Tan
micro:bit Projects with Python and Single Board Computers: Building
STEAM Projects with Code Club and Kids’ Maker Groups
Martin Tan
Doncaster Heights, VIC, Australia
Acknowledgments�����������������������������������������������������������������������������xiii
Introduction����������������������������������������������������������������������������������������xv
iii
Table of Contents
iv
Table of Contents
v
Table of Contents
vi
Table of Contents
Capacitors���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������228
Diodes����������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������229
Light-Emitting Diodes (LEDs)�����������������������������������������������������������������������230
Integrated Circuit (IC) Chips�������������������������������������������������������������������������231
Soldering!����������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������231
Tools You Will Need for Soldering����������������������������������������������������������������232
Other Useful Things to Have������������������������������������������������������������������������235
How to Solder����������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������236
Teaching Kids to Solder�������������������������������������������������������������������������������237
Handy Software Tools����������������������������������������������������������������������������������237
Embedded Programming����������������������������������������������������������������������������������242
Some Useful Concepts to Understand���������������������������������������������������������242
Approaching a New Microcontroller Electronic Project (Digital)�����������������������244
Software and Hardware Support for Proposed Components�����������������������245
Support for Languages We Are Proficient In������������������������������������������������245
Availability of Parts to Scale Things Up�������������������������������������������������������246
Draw a Diagram, Create a Schematic����������������������������������������������������������246
Breadboard Prototype����������������������������������������������������������������������������������246
Going Further�����������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������247
Introducing the Raspberry Pi Pico���������������������������������������������������������������247
Next Steps���������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������276
Summary����������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������279
Chapter 7: Cheat Sheet�������������������������������������������������������������������������������������279
Electronic Components��������������������������������������������������������������������������������279
vii
Table of Contents
Index�������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������������339
viii
About the Author
Martin Tan wrote the first Code Club Moonhack projects in Scratch and
Python, used by over 10,000 kids in Australia. He has taken kids to demo
robots and coding projects in parliament, delivered training to Code Club
Australia, and contributes to various Maker communities online. Martin
blogs on Maker topics, runs a Maker store, and works in IT security,
contributing to various open source projects and community conferences.
Most of his endeavors feed into his hobbies, which also include music,
locksport, and various techy pursuits.
ix
About the Technical Reviewer
Ioana Culic is currently a PhD candidate in the field of Internet of Things
and the cofounder of Wyliodrin, a company that offers educational and
industrial IoT solutions. She is a Teaching Assistant at the Politehnica
University of Bucharest and has also been teaching IoT technologies to
high school and university students at different events for the last five
years. Despite the technical background, writing has always been Ioana’s
passion, and she managed to mix the two. She has published several
articles in magazines such as The MagPi and Make and books on Internet
of Things technologies. Ioana has been porting JavaScript to TockOS.
xi
Acknowledgments
During our journey helping kids to learn programming (coding) and
other maker skills, there were many people who helped as we strived to
empower kids to push themselves further and leverage their newfound
skills to express their imagination and ideas. Whether it be donating time,
knowledge, or even just being supportive when I would excitedly rant
about how proud we were of the kids, it made a lasting difference to the
kids, and for that we are thankful. In this section, I also wanted to mention
some specific contributions.
Firstly, thanks to David Mander at Milgate Primary School for taking
the initiative and leap of faith to register a code club and for the many
hours spent after school making sure that the code club would run and
helping with all our extra excursions and events and dealing with the
anxiety of all the administrative requirements that came with these.
Thanks for your support in the face of much frustration at trying to prepare
things and push our club to eventually embrace text-based coding and
electronics.
From the early days: Thanks to Jay for your consistent presence in the
early years of our code club and starting the trend of alumni school kid
volunteers. And thanks to Ryan for lighting a fire under everyone in that
first year and onward with your unique game demos, and in later years,
Jamie for breaking out your super fun multilevel games.
To all the parents who volunteered their time over the years, especially
Glen and Rula who stuck around for multiple years and provided great
support and belief, which made such a difference, and helped us fumble
through some frustrating times.
xiii
Acknowledgments
xiv
Introduction
Although programming (coding) was once a skill for a very specific role,
nowadays, computers or microcontroller chips are ubiquitous; when
coupled with today’s human-friendly modern coding languages, the scope
for applying this skill is now much broader. However, in the same way that
reading or writing is useful for recreational and personal interests rather
than relegated to purely academic applications, coding and creating with
technology is now much more accessible to everyone. By embracing these
skills for creative and artistic pursuits or just to help simplify the way we
interact with our tools, the areas that once took us away from enjoying life
can now free us from the restrictions that technology previously placed on
us. For kids, this is realized through maker groups and code clubs, which
meld a previously academic skillset to apply for our own recreation or to
express our ideas into something tangible to others. Sadly, we often hear
of a disconnect between people who want to learn and the more technical
folk – the latter explaining things in their own context, without realizing
their use of jargon and what seems like abstract terminology for those that
bridge into other disciplines such as teaching. When listening to teachers,
I’ve often heard things like, “IT people don’t get it when they try to explain
to us” or “How do I implement this for a class or group?” Similarly, our
code club kids ask for project examples within their life environment, so
they could see how maker skills could be immediately useful.
Over several years, a group of volunteers and I have muddled our way
through adventures with our Australian code club, hosted at the local
primary school. This has taken us to conferences, Parliament, and our code
club kids were featured on TV and online media; had begun to incorporate
their code club skills into their social lives and school projects. Along the
way, we struggled with logistical and IT-related challenges and the quest
xv
Introduction
to make sure kids were engaged and constantly challenged to grow, rather
than just occupied. We sought to give kids ownership of these skills so
that these would not just be something they “learned about at school” but
rather something that empowered them to use across other aspects of their
lives, rather than just an academic topic. Sometimes, we failed or ran out of
time, but the net effect was that we gradually progressed over the years. As I
looked back and had my memory jogged by others as we tried to remember
the details, we realized that we had come a long way from that first day of
code club. When David, one of the school teachers; Jay, a former student
recently graduated to high school; and myself initially shuffled into a room
with a small group of kids and some computers, we wondered whether we
could even get a working program to run – now, almost a decade later, we’re
seeing kids using these skills at home and able to interact with AI interfaces,
hopefully more seamlessly and with a little less trepidation.
xvi
Introduction
Intended Audience
The intended audience for this book is teachers, parents, and volunteers
who are running or looking to run a maker group or code club for kids
aged from eight years old to those beginning high school (in Australia, the
latter is generally around 13 years old). If you’re a school-aged kid, you
can also enjoy digging through this book for the projects and find ideas for
getting your own maker group happening – all it takes is a few friends to
get together! A maker group or code club is in essence two or more people
getting together to learn and create. The book does not assume any technical
experience, as I have aimed to explain terminology in layperson’s terms
before applying it – so you will both learn and be able to talk about the
1
https://chipflip.wordpress.com/category/demoscene/
xvii
Introduction
Overview of Chapters
The chapters of this book are structured as follows:
Chapter 1: Initial considerations for your code club or maker group,
support resources, initial curriculums to use, logistical solutions to
common problems, and how we improved over time, in practice.
Chapter 2: Finding IT resources and help for your code club and
how to have the required software tools and IT infrastructure set up on
computers and in your space.
Chapter 3: This covers general Python programming concepts
and program structure and how to get the right Python programming
environments to suit your requirements and any location limitations.
Chapter 4: I talk about using more tactile approaches with e-textiles
starting from a basic electronic circuit to a programmed digital e-textile
project with readily available materials, for example, a baseball cap.
Chapter 5: Going “off map” and creating your own project; included is
a self-watering plant project created at our code club.
Chapter 6: Introducing collaboration with others, including a group
project we tested and used and systems you can use to collaborate with
volunteers or other coders. Contributing to community projects is also
discussed.
xviii
Introduction
Prerequisites
The only prerequisites are enthusiasm and a few kids that want to learn. If
you are already teaching kids how to code and have access to computers,
even better! However, this book will outline how to access what you need
and where to find help. When we started our local code club, we only
had a handful of kids, a teacher, an older student, and one person (me)
xix
Introduction
Other Resources
Throughout this book, I’ve included footnotes with various online
resources, including groups that publish free tools and materials for the
community. I also explain where to start getting involved in contributing
to community projects and how kids can also start collaborating to such
projects or even methods they can use to work collaboratively with one
another.
As you progress through this book, you’ll find that it is equally divided
into three main areas of knowledge:
xx
CHAPTER 1
Getting Started
Expectations is the place you must always go to before you get
to where you’re going.
—The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster
This chapter covers the initial considerations for getting started with
your code club or maker space. I have included examples from the
experiences from our earlier code club years with challenges faced and
give an overview of our strategies to address these. Chapter 8 will dive into
exploring these strategies in detail, using specific how-to examples and
useful templates. As you’ve probably guessed, there’s no technical content
in this chapter, but rather it is a way of outlining some of the more essential
lessons we learned after several years of running a code club.
So, let’s get started! One of the things to consider when starting a code
club or maker space is roughly what your short-term and long-term goals
are. I say “roughly” as any progress is a reasonable achievement, providing
that the kids stay eager and keep coming back for more. Goals will change
and develop as you progress. For example, an achievable goal can be as
simple as making sure every kid who attends for a year learns to write a
working program. Another goal may be to equip kids with a new skill –
allowing them to implement or prototype their ideas to a level previously
inaccessible to them. At our local club, the point at which kids became so
engrossed in what they were doing, and keen to complete something, felt
like a definite indicator that something good had “clicked.” We almost had
to drag them away from the activity so that their waiting parents could take
them home.
Once your initial, and long-term, goals are established, you’ll start to
develop a clearer picture of the requirements for those goals. The simpler
your initial goals are, the easier the requirements will be to procure – you
can easily, and probably will, refine and add to your goals as you progress!
Unsurprisingly, one of the main requirements when starting off is
volunteers to help run your code club or maker group sessions. Since
our code club is a school-based extracurricular activity, our three initial
volunteers were drawn from these three groups:
• Teachers
• Parents
2
Chapter 1 Getting Started
3
Chapter 1 Getting Started
Note With our code club, we never charged any money and just
allowed kids to apply at the start of each year. This is part of the
mission of Code Club Australia to “Get kids coding.” I did initially
donate a couple of old Raspberry Pis (Model 1B) that I had lying
around, with the school buying some accessories for these later. In a
subsequent year, the school committee asked me to write up some
workshops for a school open night and bought ten BBC micro:bits1 for
this. Along the way, we were lucky enough to have some hardware
gifted to us; it became apparent that some hardware was useful for
teachers at the school as well. Generally, most costs (outside of the
computers and network) were not excessive. When we did sometimes
have a play with some of the school’s more expensive robots, those
seemed to be nowhere near as useful or reliable as the cheaper,
simpler hardware.
1
https://microbit.org/
4
Chapter 1 Getting Started
At least we had the foresight to read through and try the first
programming exercise prior to our first session, but soon ran into some
unforeseen challenges. All the kids were facing either against the wall or
toward a desk partition in the center of the room.
That day, our short-term goal was simply to make our way through
our first code club session. Only three kids out of the group of 20 ended up
completing their projects – each had learned programming before and had
also used Scratch. A benefit of this was the other kids seeing a glimpse of
the possibilities. Meanwhile, much of our time was spent frantically racing
to each kid with their hand raised and asking for help, before they got
distracted or frustrated. The kids’ idle time was quite high at this stage, as
we had to work through each previous problem before we got to them.
At this early stage, all the kids used a shared login since they had only
used tablets during school, and classes weren’t utilizing their computer
lab time – this meant they didn’t yet have logins and us having to help each
kid log in. Projects were often not saved consistently or in a safe place. In
subsequent weeks, this work had to be repeated, making the experience
less rewarding. One week, my son brought in a game he had written and
showed the group – for a couple of weeks, there was a renewed energy and
enthusiasm in our club. Another of our code club kids, Tim, wrote a game
5
Chapter 1 Getting Started
where the player had to set everything on fire. Our other experienced kid,
Darren, wrote a game where the player controlled a fish that ate smaller
fish – at my suggestion, he later ended up adding a scoring system.
So, after our initial excitement and a slight spike a bit later, kids
were still turning up, but we still had wasted sessions, which increased
in frequency as we tried to add new activities. Although everyone had
started with a variety of different skill levels, we still weren’t seeing much
measurable progression at any level, and those initial speed bumps from
lack of good processes and fuzzy expectations began to wear thin.
In hindsight, the causes of increased delays in those early sessions can
be summarized as follows:
A failure to anticipate logistical problems: We had limited
contingency plans in place for computer or Internet problems. Credentials
to gain access to computers and online services were often forgotten
or shared, or kids/guardians lacked accountability for managing their
credentials from week to week.
Underestimating the impact of most problems: Failing to manage
login credentials to retrieve the previous week’s work, working inefficiently
by repeating ourselves, and a general lack of continuity or expectations of
acceptable behavior in code club were to take up many weeks of our time
and worked against us to stifle enthusiasm and slow down progress for
kids. A side effect of this was that the more advanced kids ended up being
less engaged and progressing slower.
Using processes that were not scalable or just not using processes:
With only a few volunteers, it was easy to communicate, but onboarding
more volunteers made it hard to be consistent. Sometimes, new volunteers
would repeat our old mistakes or raise issues that we had already resolved.
Not resolving a login problem or saving projects in a different place would
often just repeat themselves during the next week.
A lack of experience of what did and did not work in the club
environment: The idea of a club or space implies that everyone will be
at different stages of learning, albeit within a chosen path. This extends
6
Chapter 1 Getting Started
7
Chapter 1 Getting Started
Although it can be easy to have kids turn up each week and have them
copy some code into a computer or chase expensive remote-controlled
robots around, ask yourself, “How much will their capabilities have
progressed after six months?”
8
Chapter 1 Getting Started
9
Chapter 1 Getting Started
10
Chapter 1 Getting Started
11
Chapter 1 Getting Started
volunteers and teachers. For the sake of showing a club’s progression and
processes for that, I will be using our school’s code club for most of the
examples in this book. Sometimes, it may not be immediately evident what
your longer-term goals are, until you go further with your club – this was
exactly the case for our school’s code club. Whatever the case, be ready to
acknowledge these and embrace them when you see them!
A good example of a short-term milestone is to have everyone complete
their first project. Working back from this, ask yourself, “what do we need
to do to make this happen?” Remember when I mentioned that everyone
might be at a different skill level or progress differently? This is what keeps
everything fun and challenging when you try to have everyone engaged all
the time! Be prepared to have multiple activity threads and even split into
subgroups in order to manage everyone’s diverging milestones.
A long-term goal might be to be able to run a workshop that applies
coding with a new skill, such as 3D design or electronics. As you may have
guessed, there can be multiple workshops based on different interests
and skills running in your club. Once you have an idea of this long-term
goal, look at what skills would be required and how you will equip the kids
with these.
This is where your prewritten content becomes invaluable – often,
such content will also include a list of concepts or a skills matrix that
explains what kids will learn from each project or lesson. If you have this,
you can simply look at these and determine a list of projects required for
kids to obtain the skills for your first long-term goal.
Explain to everyone roughly how long the first project will take
to complete. This sets expectations and sets kids’ expectations for a
reasonably quick and easy first task. Before your first session, go through
the project and write down any tricky parts or problems with the project
code – then you can address these with the entire group at various points
during the first session. This helps everyone in parallel, leaving you to help
those that may have typed something incorrectly or need help debugging
their programming.
12
Chapter 1 Getting Started
2
https://account.codeclubau.org/register-a-club/
13
Chapter 1 Getting Started
not progressing as fast as others. I would often sit down with them, letting
them know that maybe next week someone else would be sick or not able
to attend and that it didn’t really matter as long as they were learning
and enjoying themselves. Later in this chapter, I will cover some tips and
strategies we learned to address some of the issues we ran into.
Computers/Laptops
Will these be owned by the participants or at a school or other locations,
such as a library? The answer to this question will determine the best way
to ensure that everyone has the correct computer environment set up to
14
Chapter 1 Getting Started
participate. You may need support staff. Be aware that, although many
kids have access to mobile devices, the ability to learn to look under the
covers of things and pull them apart is an integral part of the coding and
maker mindset. With a mobile device, most things are abstracted away
from the user, which tends to be counterintuitive as your group’s quest for
knowledge and understanding progresses.
15
Chapter 1 Getting Started
3
www.python.org/about/
16
Chapter 1 Getting Started
you have done a bit more learning and want to do extra workshops. There
are often a few smart kids that will get extremely excited and work through
all the learning content at home. This is part of the “at some point you will
find that everyone is at a different stage of their learning journey,” so be
prepared to be surprised with additional activities being required a little
earlier than expected.
Also, consider that if your content is online, kids know how to Google
for things and may just copy and paste, the net effect being that they feel
like they achieved more, but it effectively prevents them from learning
anything. Our local code club ran into the problem of kids working
ahead, which is great, and other kids copying finished projects so they
could move on to other activities – the side effect of the latter was that the
kids who copied projects did not have the skills for the other activities
and sometimes prevented others from participating, due to number
limitations. As a solution, we have used a few different systems to track
progress. At a midway point during the school year, we allocated a few
weeks dedicated to helping kids complete projects they might have got
stuck with or forgotten to complete. We also set up a requirement for
kids to have their projects checked by a volunteer, where we would ask
questions about how the code worked and ask the kids to verbally describe
some of the challenges they had run into and how these were solved.
In addition to sorting out the cheaters from the hard workers, this also
provides some recognition to those who have worked hard.
17
Chapter 1 Getting Started
18
Chapter 1 Getting Started
19
Chapter 1 Getting Started
means you can attend to kids quicker, reducing idle or waiting time for kids
and keeping them more engaged while learning and progressing and less
likely to be distracted.
Examples of issues that come up during a project can include
20
Chapter 1 Getting Started
The last question will give you a place to start looking. To keep our kid
programmer engaged, verbalize your thought processes.
Some useful phrases for this might be
The Posse effect Year after year, we often see a more experienced,
louder kid develop a small group who sit near them every week. This
group of kids will often progress slowly, if at all, and when pulled
aside to chat, they will sheepishly admit they haven’t done anything
or got “stuck” and never progressed past a single roadblock and
didn’t ask for help. Separating the posse or sitting down with them
21
Chapter 1 Getting Started
individually for ten minutes can sometimes identify where they got
stuck or get them back on track. Other times, we have found that
rewarding these kids when they contribute to troubleshooting can
empower them to get more involved. Again, if you have enough
people running your code club or maker group, you’ll be able to spot
and address such issues earlier.
22
Chapter 1 Getting Started
A shared file folder such as a Google Drive can also be useful for
sharing information to kids and distributing documentation between
volunteers. Just remember to set permissions so that each is separate.
4
https://arcade.makecode.com/hardware
5
https://think.cs.vt.edu/blockpy/
6
https://app.edublocks.org
7
www.tech4goodawards.com/finalist/joshua-lowe/
23
Chapter 1 Getting Started
24
Chapter 1 Getting Started
Python is much faster than Scratch and is both simple and powerful,
but it also has over 137,000 libraries that contain Python functions to
extend its capabilities while keeping the code easy to read. For example,
some uses for Python are
• Controlling machines
25
Chapter 1 Getting Started
value indicated that there was enough moisture in the soil. I showed our
teacher volunteer, David, and we knew we had finally reached a significant
milestone.
We knew that if we could get a small group of 11–12-year-olds to this
level, we could potentially open the gateway to potentially thousands of
projects. For that reason, this book will use Python or the embedded (used
on hardware) versions of MicroPython and CircuitPython for examples.
Summary
1. Determine your initial long- and short-term goals
and start with a small group before scaling to larger
or multiple groups.
5. The initial first few Code Club sessions are not too
hard, but later it is important to deal with stumbling
blocks before they become ongoing problems.
Ongoing problems can sap kids’ enthusiasm and
can result in them becoming disengaged due to lack
of progress and them having to repeat things that do
not contribute to learning.
26
Chapter 1 Getting Started
27
Chapter 1 Getting Started
13. Have processes for likely issues that will come up,
such as password/account issues. This helps you
deal with things quicker so that everything keeps
on moving.
16. Python can describe the real world. Scratch only has
one data structure – lists – but Python has many data
structures to describe real things:
28
Chapter 1 Getting Started
29
Chapter 1 Getting Started
30
Chapter 1 Getting Started
• Give a brief so they know the history and how you are
doing things.
• Find out any strengths or skills they may have and see
how these can be incorporated into what you are doing.
31
Chapter 1 Getting Started
32
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“Good gracious! how can a girl marry her grandfather? Do you
forget that you are my stepmother’s father?”
“And what of that? We are not really related. Now don’t be hasty,
my dear. Think of all I can do for you, and of all you can do for me.
You shall have anything and everything you want, and be presented
at Court. As the Countess of Greatlands you will be courted and
sought after. But you can do much more for me than that. You can
make the short span of life which yet remains to me perfectly happy.
Say yes, my dear, and my love and gratitude will know no bounds.”
But I could not say yes for a while. Yet neither could I say no. My
astonishment was almost too great for words. Still, I was not
displeased at the dazzling prospect held out to me. Reflect, dear
reader, before you blame, that I had always been told that I need
never hope to win the affection of any man, and that, while those
around me basked in the sunshine of family joys, the man did not
exist who would care to cast in his lot with mine. True, this man was
old, and he was almost decrepit. But he had singled me out from the
many others who would gladly have become Countess of Greatlands.
In doing so, he had done me an honor of which I was fully sensible,
and it was such a joy to me to have become the best beloved of
even an old man that my heart prompted me to say “yes,” as he
desired.
Still, certain scruples would obtrude themselves upon my notice,
and counseled a little hesitation.
“Belle?” I faltered at last. “I cannot! It would make such a
difference to Belle.”
“It will not make the slightest difference to Belle, I assure you,
Dorrie. She is too vain and frivolous for me to care about living in
the same house with her. Whether I marry or not, Cyril and she will
have to content themselves with the dower-house during my
lifetime. It is the same with the title. They cannot have it until I am
gone, and your present possession of it will not keep them out of it
one day after it accrues to them. Come, my dear, end my suspense,
and keep the promise you made me a while ago.”
“My father? And Lady Elizabeth?”
“Have no solid objections to offer.”
Neither had I after that. But, somehow, the enraptured kiss with
which my old lover sealed our engagement was not the sort of thing
I had pictured in my day-dreams, and I involuntarily shivered under
his caresses.
“What is it, my little pet, are you cold?” he asked solicitously.
“Just a little,” was my evasive answer. “This room always seems
chilly. But that does not matter. Tell me, for it seems so strange, how
it is that you actually want to marry me, of all people in the world.
Look how ugly I am!”
“You are not ugly to me, my dear. Besides, I am past thinking
outward appearance the sole recommendation and guarantee of a
happy life. I need more than mere outward beauty.”
“And you think you have found it?”
“I am sure I have found it! And now, my love, with your
permission, I will remain here until your father comes. I shall see
you again later in the day.”
Having thus virtually received my dismissal, I sped up to my own
room, but not before my ardent lover had claimed another kiss as
his due.
Did I feel glad?
Or did I feel dismayed?
I was really unable to tell myself which sensation predominated. I
met Belle on the landing, and was conscious of a strange feeling of
trepidation, which made me slink into my own room like some one
guilty of a mean action.
Oh, dear! how could I ever face them all? I thought. How could I
ever have the presumption to pose as the superior in rank and
family prestige to my beloved stepmother? Why, if I married her
father, I should be her stepmother. And my sister’s mother-in-law!
And my father’s mother-in-law, too! And—could it be possible?—my
own step-grandmother! There were no end of complications involved
in the new arrangement; and, as I pondered over them, I became
more and more doubtful as to the propriety of accepting the grand
future held out to me. And yet, if I could do so without repugnance
on my part, and with an honest determination to prove that the earl
had acted wisely in selecting me as the wife of his old age, why
should I not become a great lady? Why—
But my conjectures were interrupted at this juncture by a very
unusual event. Belle had actually come to visit me in my own room!
I knew instinctively, however, that her visit boded me no good, and
when I looked up into her face, I saw that she was in a demoniacal
temper.
“Is it true?” she cried, as she flung herself on a chair just in front
of me. “Is it true that you have actually deluded that old imbecile
into offering marriage to you? My father has just told me that you
are to become the Countess of Greatlands at a very early date. But
the news is too monstrous for belief! A hideous little reptile like you
to lord it over me! A shrimp of a girl, whose gauchérie and ill-
manners are proverbial, to dare to assume airs of superiority over
me! I tell you it shall not be. I will not have it. Sooner than endure
such a humiliation I would—I would—”
“And pray what would you do?” I asked, not with the compunction
I had felt a while ago at the idea of relegating my beautiful sister to
a secondary position. Nor yet with the anger which had blazed up in
me on hearing the commencement of her virago-like harangue. But
with the cool contempt of one who feels that her position is
impregnable, and that her assailant is beneath consideration. “And
how will you prevent an arrangement with which you are not of
sufficient importance to be permitted to interfere?”
Perhaps it was astonishment at the unwonted courage with which
I met her assault. Perhaps it was a sudden access of prudence. But
whatever the cause, the effect was the same. Belle declined to tell
me how she would prevent my marriage with the earl. But she
continued to revile me for some minutes as treacherous, deceitful
and scheming, and wound up by saying that I need not congratulate
myself upon my seeming triumph, as Lord Egreville would certainly
not permit his father to perpetrate the folly he contemplated, even if
he had to swear that he was no longer responsible for his actions.
To all this I steadfastly refused any further reply, and, becoming
tired of leveling abuse which seemed to make no impression, Belle
left the room as suddenly as she had entered it. Once alone, I found
that my own feelings with regard to the coming event had
undergone a complete revolution. I no longer entertained the
slightest doubt as to the propriety of having consented to accept the
earl. On the contrary, I was strongly determined to fulfill my
promise, and to remove myself forever from the tyranny of Belle’s
reproaches and airs of superiority. Very much to my own surprise,
too, I felt very indignant at the slights cast upon the earl, and found
my heart warm considerably toward him. For, when I came to think
of it, he had always treated me kindly, and even when I thought he
was deliberately insulting me, he must really have meant what he
said. That his taste was peculiar, to say the least, was patent even to
myself, but that was all the more reason for gratitude and love on
my part.
Gratitude? Yes, that was undoubted. Love? Why not? Surely it is
not so very hard for the one to engender the other.
Presently Lady Elizabeth came to my door and asked my
permission to enter. This was readily given, though I already felt
very much overwrought, and dreaded the coming interview. But I
need not have been uneasy about that; for, as usual, my good
stepmother had only my welfare at heart.
“I am afraid Belle has been giving you an uncomfortable time of
it,” she said, drawing a chair toward me and kissing me
affectionately. “She is fuming in the drawing-room, and has sent for
Cyril to consult with him as to what is best to be done in this
remarkable crisis.”
“And you?” I asked beseechingly. “Do you think I have been a
scheming, wicked girl, and that I have done wrong in accepting the
earl?”
“Certainly not, my child. I have known for some time that my
father wished to make you his wife. Indeed, he consulted me as to
the wisdom of doing so, and I gave my unqualified approval to his
project. Seeing that he had set his heart on having a young wife, I
preferred to see you in that capacity rather than any one else. But I
hope that you are fully alive to the duties that will be expected of
you.”
“Indeed yes,” I answered soberly. “I mean to do all in my power to
make the earl happy.”
“That is right. If you think only of promoting his happiness, your
own will come, as a matter of course. But tell me, have you any idea
that the ceremony is expected to take place almost immediately?”
“Oh no! how can it? I am too young yet to marry.”
“My dear, in a case like this the bride’s youth counts for nothing,
and the bridegroom’s age carries all other considerations before it.
Your father also agrees that it is best to make immediate
arrangements, and there is really no reason why you should not be
married next week.”
And somehow it was all decided, almost without referring again to
me, that on the following Wednesday I should be transformed into
the Countess of Greatlands. I have no doubt that society partially
echoed Belle’s sneers and voted the earl half crazy. But if it did, its
criticisms did not trouble me, and I was supremely happy as I
reveled in the lavish preparations that were being made for the great
event. Belle’s wedding was indefinitely postponed, although it had at
first been spoken of as an almost immediate event.
So far as I could judge, Lord Egreville was as bitterly opposed to
the earl’s wedding as Belle was. He was just distantly civil to me,
and I took no trouble to ingratiate myself with him. Sometimes,
when the couple sat whispering in a corner, I surprised an occasional
glance that was positively malignant in its intensity of hatred. Once
or twice I remembered my sister’s assertion that she would prevent
my marriage, and wondered vaguely if she were really hatching
some plot against me. Then a certainty that it was out of her power
to harm me consoled me once more, and I pursued the happy tenor
of my way, all my time occupied either by the earl’s visits or by my
initiation into further gayeties of attire.
The wedding itself was to be a very quiet affair, and as soon as it
was over my husband was going to take me into Derbyshire for a
week. Then we were to go to the castle, which was being rapidly
prepared for my reception.
And so the time flew on, until Tuesday came round once more. To-
morrow was to be my wedding day.
To-morrow! Oh, that dreadful to-morrow! Shall I ever forget it as
long as I live?
CHAPTER IV.
“There will be no wedding to-day.”
That night I went to bed hoping to the last that Belle would relent
and say a kindly word to me. For after all, she was the only sister I
had, and I would have been thankful to have been reconciled with
her. But she was as implacable as ever, and never uttered one kindly
word to me amid all the congratulations of others; although Lady
Elizabeth had, I know, remonstrated with her on her unsisterly
behavior. My father did not care to interfere in the matter, especially
as his sympathies were all in favor of his eldest daughter.
I was up betimes, for we were to be at the church at ten o’clock. I
had been sorely exercised about the choice of a wedding dress, as I
feared that white would make me look more hideous than usual. But
Lady Elizabeth had persuaded me to have a creamy satin, and,
somehow, as I surveyed myself in the glass, I was not quite so
dissatisfied with the result as I had expected to be. The freckles had
found the London atmosphere uncongenial, and had departed, I
fervently hoped forever. My complexion too had changed from a
muddy hue to a clear dark olive which, though far from being
satisfactory, was a considerable improvement on its former
condition. My hair, thanks to the skillful treatment of Lady Elizabeth’s
maid, had grown much thicker, and looked rather nice than
otherwise.
But, in spite of these improvements, I was still an ugly,
insignificant-looking slip of a girl, and I lost myself in wonderment at
the thought of such great good fortune coming to me. There were to
be no bridemaids, only a few personal friends having been invited to
church, though there was to be a reception at the house afterward.
Belle had at first declared her intention of refusing to accompany us
to church. But perhaps the thought that she would, by holding
herself aloof, betray to the world at large how deeply chagrined she
was, induced her to alter her mind.
Still, when I saw her in the hall, just before we started, I could not
account for her unusual appearance. She was positively livid, and
shook every now and then in the strangest manner. Both my father
and Lady Elizabeth conceived the idea that she must be ill, but she
assured them that there was nothing the matter with her.
“But of course one feels a little excited at seeing one’s sister so
suddenly raised to splendor,” she said, with a side glance at me
which displayed so curious a mixture of fear and hatred that I lost all
my good spirits, and was driven to church in an unaccountable state
of nervousness and trepidation, which was increased when I saw
that the bridegroom and Lord Egreville, who was to officiate as best
man, were not here first, according to arrangement.
“I am surprised they are not here yet,” whispered Lady Elizabeth.
“Never mind, dear, they are sure to come soon.”
So I thought, too. But for the life of me I could not hinder the
tears which came to ease my head and my heart, both of which
were in a state of painful tension. By-and-by, I looked up to see
Belle’s eyes fixed upon me once more. But what had wrought a
change in her again? Her expression was no longer one of fear, but
of victory. The hatred was there yet, and that did not surprise me.
But how to account for the unmistakable triumph which I had seen
manifest itself on her face for a moment?
Like a flash her words recurred to me: “I tell you, it shall not be! I
will not have it! Sooner than endure such a humiliation I would—”
Ah! what would she do? What had she done? I asked myself
anxiously. Something decisive. Something disastrous to me, I knew,
or her face would not have worn that momentary impress of a
purpose accomplished. Somehow, through all the weary waiting that
followed, my powers of observation and deduction seemed strung to
their highest pitch. I noticed that as the moments dragged on
without bringing the two gentlemen, Lady Elizabeth and my father
grew momentarily more anxious. And I also noticed that Belle no
longer looked expectantly toward the door, as every one else kept
doing, but that she bore all the appearance of one whose desires
were accomplished.
At last, unable to bear the suspense any longer, my father rose
from his seat, and, whispering to Lady Elizabeth that he was going
to the earl’s temporary town residence, to ascertain the cause of the
strange delay, he left the church without further preamble, my
acutely attuned ears shortly afterward hearing the rattling of his cab-
wheels down the street.
Lady Elizabeth, who sat next to me, put a caressing hand upon my
own, and whispered: “Do not look so frightened, child. I do not
suppose they will be long in coming now.”
“They will never come!” was my reply, intended only for my
comforter’s ears. “They will never come! Something dreadful has
happened, and Belle knows it. See how calm and self-satisfied she is
now. Remember the state she was in before she came. She vowed
that my marriage should not take place. She has made her vow
come true!”
Lady Elizabeth cast a startled glance at Belle, but had no time to
comment upon my words, for at this moment we heard an excited
hubbub near the door, and Marvel, the earl’s valet, came down the
aisle with a face which advertised bad news.
“Will your ladyship please leave the church as quickly as you can?”
he said to my stepmother. “And take the bride with you. There will
be no wedding to-day.”
“For God’s sake, tell me what is the matter!” she exclaimed.
“Something dreadful has happened to my father!”
“An accident has occurred to him,” said Marvel, with an attempt to
speak as if it were nothing serious. But his voice broke in the
endeavor, and he sobbed forth: “Oh, my poor master! it is too
dreadful!”
“What is the matter with him?” cried Lady Elizabeth, fairly shaking
the man in the intensity of her excitement and dread. “Tell me at
once.”
When I heard Marvel’s reply, I neither shrieked nor fainted. For I
had felt sure that he would say what he did.
“He is dead!” he said, and my eyes, flaming and accusing now, at
once sought Belle’s, flashing my conviction of her guilt in her face.
Under that glance she reeled as if from a blow.
I hardly know what else happened that morning. I went home as
in a dream, feeling somehow more sorry for Lady Elizabeth than for
myself, and wondering if they would hang Belle when it was
discovered that she had murdered the earl; for my mind refused to
disabuse itself of a conviction of her guilt, although reason pointed
to the conclusion that it was impossible for her to have injured the
earl, seeing that she had not seen him, or spoken to him, for twenty
hours.
The wedding guests returned to their own homes, there to discuss
the sensational interruption to what some of them had voted the
most sensational wedding of the season. My father reached home
soon after we did, and confirmed Marvel’s story in every detail. The
Earl of Greatlands had been found by Marvel, who had grown
alarmed when he did not rise at eight o’clock, lying in ghastly rigidity
in the bed which he had sought some hours earlier in apparently
unusually buoyant health and spirits. A glance convinced Marvel that
life was quite extinct, and a moment later he was rousing the
household with shouts and cries. Of course everybody came rushing
up to the earl’s room. And of course several doctors were summoned
at once. But it was only too patent from the very first that there was
no hope, and though there was much loud lamentation on the part
of the servants, and quite a touching display of sorrow on the part of
Lord Egreville, or, rather, the new Earl of Greatlands, it was not of
the slightest avail, and the fiat speedily went forth to the world that
Lionel, ninth Earl of Greatlands, being in an unusually excited state,
owing to his prospective marriage, had succumbed to unsuspected
heart disease.
Nearly all the world accepted this explanation of the tragic event
which had, at one blow, deprived me of husband, wealth, title,
position and influence, and had converted Lord Egreville into the
peer he longed to be.
But not for one moment did I believe that the doctors had given
anything like a true diagnosis of the cause of the late earl’s death.
There is a fashion in everything, even in matters of life and death,
and nowadays it seems to be an epidemical fashion with medical
men to ascribe every sudden death of which they do not understand
the cause to unsuspected heart disease. The explanation is
plausible, and, in all likelihood, more often than not correct,
although there is a strong element of guess-work about it. Post
mortem examinations are horrible and unpleasant contingencies to
contemplate, and the feelings of relatives and friends are apt to be
cruelly wounded by the bare mention of such a dernier resort.
Of course it would have been extremely painful for all parties
concerned if an inquest over the remains of the Earl of Greatlands
had been suggested; but I never doubted for one instant that such a
course would have resulted in the discovery of foul play, such as only
I—and one other, as subsequent events proved—suspected.
Suspected! do I say? It was no mere suspicion with me. It was a
firm and rooted conviction, that nothing but absolute proof to the
contrary could ever dispel. And that proof, since no one broached
the advisability of an inquest, was not likely to be afforded me. No
doubt there was considerable marvel in some people’s minds
concerning my manner of bearing the sudden reverse of fortune
which had befallen me, but their opinion troubled me little, and it
was not likely that I would occupy the minds of sensation-mongers
long after I had been relegated to my former status of insignificant
obscurity. Tears did not often come to relieve the aching weight
which oppressed me, as I pondered in what perhaps struck those
who were unable to gauge my real feelings as a hard and defiant
mood.
How could they tell, however, that the grief I felt for the loss of
the man who had loved me outweighed my regret for my lost
glories, since I let very few words of sorrow escape me? Indeed, I
dared not indulge in comments with any one, for I feared lest the
horror and loathing which I now felt for my sister and her fiancé
should break the bounds in which I had resolved for the time being
to entrammel them, and overflow in a torrent of bitter denunciation
and invective. I should imagine that there are few girls of stronger
passions for love or for hatred than myself, and I sometimes caught
myself wondering how I managed to refrain from publicly
denouncing those whom I firmly believed to be the deliberate
murderers of my dear old earl; for I hated them with a hatred that
was consuming in its wild intensity. Yes, my hatred was of fearful
force. But I was swayed by an even stronger passion, which held it
at bay.
This was my love for Lady Elizabeth, the first being who, since my
mother died, had opened her heart to me, and who was now
prostrated by a nervous attack, due to grief at the loss of her father,
between whom and herself the strongest sympathy had always
existed. She had of late admitted me largely into her confidence,
and I had gained so much knowledge of her nature that I knew
what a bitter blow such family disgrace would be to her as would
overtake us all were my convictions shared by others. For my
father’s sake I would not have repressed my wild longing for
vengeance. For Lady Elizabeth’s sake I could have submitted to
make an even greater sacrifice.
But even my great love for her could not induce me to hold
friendly intercourse with Belle, or to withhold the fierce glances of
accusation under which the new Earl of Greatlands writhed in
impotent rage. He saw that I suspected evil-doing of some sort on
his part, and he resented my glances at first by frowns of defiance.
But somehow, when I continued to maintain steadfastly the
antagonistic attitude I had assumed, he grew manifestly uneasy, and
even went so far as to presume to address words of sympathy to
me, which implied that he imagined me to cherish animosity against
him merely because he was occupying the place of the man who
was to have been my husband, and suggested that he hoped I
would no longer hold aloof from him and Belle as if I thought they
had done me an injury.
To this misjudged attempt to induce me to bury the hatchet I
vouchsafed no response but a cold stare of contempt and a curl of
the lip which spoke volumes. Indeed, so potent was this mute
answer of mine that the earl almost ceased to visit our house, and
my father was informed by Belle that my violence and ill manners
had succeeded in depriving her to a great extent of her lover’s
society.
“Dora,” said my affectionate parent to me one morning after
breakfast, “I am sorry to observe that you have lapsed into your
former ill-conditioned state of selfish ill-breeding. I have made all
due allowance for the disappointment you must have felt at being
prevented from becoming the great lady you expected to be. But I
have noticed with growing displeasure that you are venting your
spleen in an unjustifiable manner upon Belle. Certainly, she is going
to occupy the position you thought would be yours, but she is doing
you no personal injury thereby, for your chances are irrevocably
gone, and she was engaged to the present Earl of Greatlands before
the marriage between yourself and his father was arranged. It is
therefore abominable that you should try to make her life miserable
by driving her lover from the house, and doing your best to produce
an estrangement between them; and if you continue your present
behavior, I shall insist upon your going to live at the Grange until we
are ready to leave London.”
Lady Elizabeth was too ill to come downstairs, and was, therefore,
not present during this harangue. Otherwise it would probably not
have been made; for, even in things that wholly and solely
concerned me, my father was wont to show that consideration for
his wife, who loved me, that he would never have displayed toward
me for my own sake, and he treated me with tolerable politeness
when in her presence. But when she was not there, he showed the
same unbounded partiality for Belle and the same lack of sympathy
for me which had always distinguished our intercourse in the past;
and it is not surprising that my lately acquired self-reliance prompted
me to retort that I was best aware of the motives of my conduct,
and that Belle was not likely to lose her lover through me, since their
destiny would henceforth be ruled by the promptings of an evil
conscience.
“You miserable little wretch!” exclaimed my father. “How dare you
speak to me in that tone? And how dare you cast innuendoes
against Belle and Cyril which virtually amount to an accusation?”
“An accusation of what, sir?” I asked, with a calm deliberateness
which surprised even myself, and caused my father to stagger as if
he had received a blow. And, indeed, he had received such a blow
as is to be hoped falls to the lot of few fathers. For my looks and
manner, more than my words, had struck him with the sudden
conviction that his favorite child was suspected of having at least
been accessory to a mortal crime. That the suspicion emanated from
the brain of another of his children mattered little to him, for he
already disliked me too intensely to feel any heart-pangs on my
account. It was quite sufficient, however, to cause him to cast aside
the last shred of conventionality as regarded his treatment of myself.
What transpired during the next five minutes I prefer not to relate.
There are events in the lifetime of most people which possess either
too sacred or too painful an interest for discussion with others. The
memory of my last interview with my father awakes in me no
emotion but that of resentment at the constant injustice with which
he had always treated me, and which culminated on this occasion in
my expulsion from his house.
Perhaps he thought that I would not take him at his word, and
that at the end of the hour which he had named as the limit of time
he would allow me in which to pack up my belongings and rid my
family of my presence, I would weepingly sue for mercy and promise
to be polite and conciliatory to Belle and the Earl of Greatlands. The
mere supposition that I, whose passions were of the strongest, could
thus do violence to my feelings, and acknowledge the superiority of
two people whom I hated and despised with all my heart, for the
sake of retaining a home in which I could never hope to be happy
again, still serves to excite my indignation and to provoke me to a
feeling of resentment which I would fain repudiate in my calmer
moments.
For, after all, my father, poor man, was blinded by his partiality for
Belle; and although he fully grasped the deadly import of my
unspoken suspicions, he never for a moment doubted his beautiful
darling’s goodness, but accepted my attitude merely as a convincing
proof of the monstrosity of nature of one to whom had been denied
that outward fairness which in his eyes was equal to the strongest
proof of inward purity. Thus I sometimes reason, in attempted
palliation of his harshness to me. But, somehow, my reasoning has
an awkward knack of doubling upon itself and transforming my
would-be kindlier leanings into the old imbittered resentment.
My preparations for departure were soon made, although as yet
my brain was in too great a turmoil to permit me to make a definite
plan for my future guidance. I must remove myself and my
belongings quickly. And I must take my leave of Lady Elizabeth
without permitting her to be pained by a knowledge of the
permanent nature of the estrangement between myself and my
family. The latter was a difficult feat for me to perform. But I
succeeded in going through the interview in a manner which it
pleased me to recall during my subsequent sufferings; for my dear
stepmother was spared the pain which would have been hers, if she
had realized the anguish of mind which my love for her caused me
to hide.
I found her in her dressing-room, reclining on a couch which was
drawn up to the fire, the day being somewhat chilly for the time of
year. I noted with a sudden foreboding dread the change which the
last few weeks had wrought in Lady Elizabeth’s appearance. She was
paler, thinner, and altogether much more fragile-looking than when,
so short a time ago, she had assisted me to select the trousseau for
my own marriage with her father. There was, however, a light in her
eyes which had, until lately, been a stranger to them, and which had
caused me considerable uneasiness. For it gave me the impression
that it had its origin in a feeling deeper even than the grief which an
affectionate daughter would naturally feel at the loss of a beloved
parent.
Could it be that—oh, no! perish the thought! Why should she be
tortured by such suspicions as had fixed their scorpion-fangs in my
brain? She could scarcely be so fully convinced of Belle’s capacity for
evil as I was, since she had never known her until the glamour of
her artfulness and beauty was such as to cause nearly every one
who knew her to take a fancy to her. Nor had she such deep reason
to distrust one of her own mother’s children as was the case with
me. Some hidden sorrow was sapping her life’s strength. But I
fervently and sincerely prayed that it might not be the hideous
phantom of suspicion which was bidding fair to wreck my own life.
“I have come to say good-by for a time,” I said, speaking with
wonderful quietness for one whose brain was in a whirl of stormy
emotion. “As you know, things are not as pleasant as they might be
between Belle and myself, and father and I have agreed that it will
be best for me to return to the Grange for a while. The change will
do me good, but I shall be grieved to part from you.”
“But, my dear, we are all going to the Grange shortly,” said Lady
Elizabeth, casting upon me a look of anxious scrutiny. “Come here.
Kneel beside me, and tell me all about this sudden arrangement.
Have Belle and you been quarreling?”
“Belle and I have not been quarreling,” I answered, as I dropped
on my knees beside the only woman in the world who loved me, and
stroked her white hand between my much less shapely ones. “But
you may have noticed that, whether rightly or wrongly, I cannot feel
happy in her presence. The earl, your brother, too, seems to be kept
away from the house through the antagonism which he and I feel
for each other. I feel as if it were wicked to dislike any one nearly
related to you. But, indeed, I cannot help it. So you must forgive
me, and let me go from you now with nothing but the kindest and
most loving words from you; for, believe me, I am more sorely in
need of your sympathy than ever I was, and could not bear to think
of an estrangement between you and me.”
“Dorrie, I have learned to love you, and I know that you are not
likely to form violent antipathies without a cause. I also feel
convinced that your treatment of—of—my brother is dictated by the
strongest feeling on your part. The nature of that feeling must
remain unknown to me, for I dread confirmation of certain thoughts
which fill my days and nights with terror. Even should you prove to
be actually unjust to my brother, it will make no difference between
us. But, if you are really leaving town before the rest of us do, you
must promise me one thing.”
“I will promise anything to you.”
“I know your willingness to serve me, and I think I can gauge
your love for me, but I am about to exact a great proof of both.
Listen. All my life I have yielded to the dictates of family pride. I
have been proud of my ancient lineage and unsullied family
escutcheon; so proud, indeed, that I did not hesitate to ally myself
with one who had once been one of the humblest sons of the
people. I never dreamed of the possibility of my being lowered to his
family level by marrying him, but was sure that the prestige of my
own connections would over-shadow the possible vulgarity of his
antecedents. In marrying a wealthy commoner, of whose personal
worthiness I felt thoroughly convinced, I hoped to be able to assist
my family to a financial position more commensurate with their
social status than the aristocratic impecuniosity which had been our
lot for many years, owing to the extravagance of my grandfather,
who had mortgaged the greater part of the estate. My expectations
were fully justified. My husband was kind and generous, and
whatever my original feelings toward him may have been, I can
truthfully say that his upright nature won my complete loyalty and
respect. I was certainly disappointed to find myself comparatively
poor after his death. But I have had time to think the matter over
since then, and believe that the people to whom he left the bulk of
his money must have needed it more than I did. I see that you
wonder why I am telling you all this. I assure you I have a strong
enough motive, for I want you to realize that I would sacrifice
everything to the honor of my family—love, happiness, even life
itself. This being the case, can you picture how terrible it would be
to me to see even the shadow of public disgrace fall upon our name?
That you have ample provocation for a certain course of conduct
which would materially affect the interests of my brother, and of
your sister, I know. I also know that you return the love I bear you.
Let that love outweigh the resentment you feel at the conduct of
others. If you are not inclined to spare them, for God’s sake spare
me the anguish which a disclosure of your—of your suspicions would
cause me! You are leaving us for a time. I implore you to have
mercy upon an ancient name.”
By the time Lady Elizabeth had got thus far, she was sobbing in
uncontrollable excitement, and clung to me with convulsive
apprehension. As for me, I was filled with grief at this disclosure of
the suffering which my dear one was undergoing. I could no longer
doubt that she shared all my own painful suspicions, and that to her
distressed state of mind her recent physical prostration was
attributable. And I was stabbed by the remorseful thought that I had
been the one to originate the dread suspicions which were doing so
much mischief. Was it too late to undo the mischief? Could I hope to
remove the terrible burden of dread which oppressed Lady
Elizabeth? It was doubtful. But there was too much at stake to
warrant hesitation on my part, and my course of conduct was
instantaneously mapped out.
“Mother,” I said, as quietly as my emotion would permit, “I cannot
pretend not to understand the meaning of what you have just said.
But, oh! my dear, how could you think I meant all that I implied to
you on that terrible morning, when I was beside myself with anxiety
and grief? Put away such thoughts from your mind. It is the
misfortune, not the fault, of Cyril and Belle, that all the
circumstances attending recent events have seemed as if specially
guided for their interests. But if even I, who am so great a loser by
their advancement, can say that my first suspicions were
unjustifiable and wicked, surely you can no longer think them
capable of a crime too atrocious for even ready-dyed criminals to
think of.”
Lady Elizabeth suddenly raised her head and literally gasped with
mingled relief and amazement.
“Is it possible,” she cried, “that I have been tormenting myself
needlessly? That I have foully wronged Cyril and Belle? That I have
mistaken your dislike to them for a stronger sentiment—that of a
thirst for justifiable revenge for a deadly injury?”
“Quite possible. Think. Our dear old earl could not have been
expected to live very much longer. He was happy. So happy, that he
was naturally excited. Excitement is not good for weakly old people,
and the skillful doctors who were summoned were sure to be able to
judge of the real cause of death. You cannot tell how much I regret
having given audible expression to a cruel suspicion. But you can do
as I have done—and repudiate it.”
“Do you repudiate it?”
“Most certainly I do.”
“Thank God for that! You have lifted a nightmare from my mind.
Do you know that the promise I wished to exact from you was that
you would at least spare me the suffering which a denunciation of
my brother Cyril would cause me?”
“A denunciation! Ah, well—I don’t like him. I never shall like him.
But as there is nothing to denounce, I can safely promise you, nay,
swear to you, that never, so long as you live, will I, by word or deed,
do aught that can injure any member of your family or in any way
jeopardize its good name.”
“You swear this?”
“I swear it!”
“You have given me a new lease of life, my darling, and by the
time we join you at the Grange you will see me almost as vigorous
as ever.”
“I hope so. But I must be off now, or I shall not be ready when
the cab comes round for me. Good-by.”
“Good-by, my dear. I hope the change will do you good. You too
have been drooping lately.”
“I suppose I have. But country air will work wonders, eh?”
Another minute, and I had hurried out of Lady Elizabeth’s room,
with breaking heart and whirling brain. Should I ever see her again?
To what had I pledged myself? I had, for her sake, forsworn all my
dreams of punishing those whom I firmly believed to be the
murderers of the Earl of Greatlands. Certainly, I had never intended
to invoke the vengeance of the law upon them, for I also had some
regard to the maintenance of the esteem in which the two families
were held by the world at large. But I had meant to elucidate, by
some means, the extent of their culpability, and to show them up to
their relatives in all their hideous criminality, leaving them to
continue their career stripped of the misplaced love and confidence
that had hitherto been so charily bestowed upon me.
Surely this was but a feeble ideal of the punishment due to a great
crime which had deprived me of everything that made my life worth
living. But I was now bereft of even this small satisfaction, for I had,
for the sake of Lady Elizabeth, pledged myself to do nothing that
would reflect discredit upon her family. I had even gone so far as to
repudiate all my suspicions, and so long as she lived I must do
nothing to re-awaken the terrors which had been tormenting her of
late.
Does any one doubt that I found this sacrifice of my personal
inclinations very hard to bear? or that it was not a real sacrifice to
leave my enemies to gloat unrestrainedly at the success of their evil
plotting? Or do they imagine that the feelings I harbored were
unjustifiable? If so, let them imagine themselves in my position. Let
them picture all that I had lost and suffered, and contrast my lot
with what would have been my condition had the earl’s life not
terminated when it did. True, I had as yet not the slightest practical
evidence to support my opinion of the culpability of the new earl and
his fiancée; but as my personal conviction never admitted the
slightest doubt on that score, I found its virtual abandonment all the
harder to bear, though nothing would now make me disregard Lady
Elizabeth’s wishes. And this I mention, not for the sake of
demonstrating my powers of self-sacrifice, but to show how
gratefully I reciprocated the kindness of my stepmother, and to show
how my heart hungered for love, since the lavishment of a little of it
upon me had power to arouse in me a feeling so passionate as to be
almost akin to worship.
And now I was about to leave, probably forever, the one being
who cared for me. Small wonder that the hard feelings which had
hitherto enabled me to keep my composure should break down, and
that the quick tears of utter lonesomeness should chase each other
down my pale cheeks as I hurriedly gathered my belongings
together, and began to pack them in the substantial trunks which
had been provided by Lady Elizabeth to hold the trousseau with
which her loving liberality had provided me.
“Excuse me, Miss Dora, but my lady has sent me to see if I can be
of any use to you. You are packing everything up? Then pray let me
do it for you.”
I looked up through my tears, and saw Agnes, my stepmother’s
maid, standing ready to relieve me of my task. She was in such
evident sympathy with me that at sight of her kindly face my last
shred of composure left me, and I wept in such an abandonment of
grief as only a feeling of utter desolation can produce. Agnes was
frightened at the violence of my emotion and did her best to console
me. But I presently became calmer, and thanking her for the trouble
she was taking, gladly availed myself of her help in packing my
boxes. I felt no hesitation in taking everything that belonged to me,
for all I had worth having was due to the generosity of Lady
Elizabeth or of her father. To my own father I owed nothing of which
I was now possessed, the last item of the unbecoming garments
which he had so grudgingly bestowed upon me having disappeared
long ago.
In another half an hour I was ready to go, and a few moments
later the cab for which I had sent was at the door. As I stepped into
it I glanced at the upper windows of the house which was no longer
a home for me. I saw Lady Elizabeth, who had come to her window
to wave me a smiling good-by. Evidently no one had yet told her
that I was permanently banished from my father’s house. I smiled
and kissed my hand to her, resolved that her last glimpse of me
should be as pleasant as possible. Then my eyes sought the level of
the drawing-room windows, to see—what? My sister standing there
by the side of the Earl of Greatlands, both of them displaying the
greatest delight at my departure, and both of them casting
contemptuous glances of triumph on a poor, homeless girl whose
presence near them was a continual reproach.
But their malevolence did not get all the satisfaction it sought, for
my glance wandered swiftly upward again, and rested on my
stepmother’s smiling face, until I was driven out of sight altogether,
with such apparent unconsciousness of their presence that they
could not know I had seen them. And thus I entered upon the battle
of life on my own account.
CHAPTER V.
“A maiden’s fancies.”
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